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Stories from 12 years of Casino Industry

I was asked to make a post about some stories within the Casino grounds so I thought I'd share. I have many so I'll do my best to pick the better ones.
Some back information: I've been a Casino Dealer for 11 years, I've been a supervisor for five years, and I've been a Surveillance Operator for one year. I've worked at three properties, none of which are connected or owned by the same company. I've worked on : Government/Private/Native American owned casinos.
  1. From Hero to Zero.
At my first Casino, I was one of the first group of people who were trained to deal Roulette . After 4 weeks of working 6PM-3AM then doing roulette training from 3AM-8AM (Not paid) , I actually really enjoyed the game and after about six months I became extremely quick at the number game and the pace of the action was steady with very low margin of errors. Young man walks in, cashes in for $500. He buys in for $2 chips and just loads the board. After a few spins and pretty decent hits, he then changes his chips from $2 to 5$ then to $10 and racks his winnings up to $10,000. It was then, five spins in a row, he loaded the board with some pretty gross bets, and every spin I would hit the ONE number with either NO CHIPS on it, or maybe 1 chip , He lost all $10,000 in a matter of minutes. He leaves , and I go on break. After my break I was going back to the same table and wouldn't you know it, the same young man walks in and cashes in another $500. He tells me he just sold his car outside and this is all that he had left. So we do the same deal, buys in for $2 chips, then slowly starts betting $5 chips, $10, $25...and he makes $10,000 AGAIN. Within the next 25 minutes it was straight agony. Every spin, same thing, he would bet $2500 in chips, and win only $250, $400, and after about a half hour he lost it all . Never saw the guy again.
2) Man down
At this property, we are 24 hours for table games. It's currently 5AM , and I'm dealing some $25 Blackjack to this guy. He's probably early thirties , heavy guy. He's sober as can be, but right away I can tell he's been losing. We know how much you've bought in for, how much your down, or up, and I could see he was down $2000+. After about twenty minutes of pure losing, his temper starts to flare.At this point I now have two other guests at my table. Drinking coffee, not saying a word, just losing their money. After losing hand, after hand, this guy looks me straight in the eye, seized up, starts shaking, he can't move. He tries to punch towards me and smashes his stack of chips all over the place and falls backwards to the floor. I call for security, we cannot touch him due to liability . I can't move from my table because, well, liability / casino cash property, all I can do is try to talk to him. As I'm doing so, these other two woman who are sitting at my table just look at me and one says "OK, dealer, cmon lets go " as she taps the table telling me to start dealing and forget about the guy having a stroke on the floor. As security takes him to the ambulance out front, I had to stay behind for a couple minutes and give a statement. I go on break. I come back, and 45 minutes later, he comes right back in with a oxygen tank and keeps gambling for the remainder of the morning.
3) You get a dildo, and YOU get a dildo!
On a late summer Saturday night, we had a large event for these massive muscle guys/strongman competition type thing. After their show, I'm at the roulette table , and five of these boys come over to play. They were absolutely hilarious. They were feeling pretty good, cashed in somewhat large amounts and I could tell this was going to be a fun time. After about a hour of dealing to these guys, it's almost midnight, everybody is pretty hammered , I spin the ball, and all five of these guys take out these god damn (what I can only tell was) two feet purple dildos from inside their pants, and wiping them around in the air. The ladies were just loving it, one of the dildos landed in the roulette wheel and we had to shut the table down to re-calibrate the wheel to make sure nothing had been changed. I just remember that night was so much damn fun, I couldn't believe what I was seeing and I would never forget it.
4) Full Moon
On this day, I was actually training dealers / supervising them on small games like Three Card poker. We opened the table at 10AM, and this older man came and sat down . He played all day. The jackpot was $21,000 and that was pretty high for this table. He played, and played and played. He's one of the players where you know he's wearing a diaper because he's been drinking coffee/pop all day and hasn't moved in eight hours. As the day went on, this man never moved from his chair. Getting closer to midnight, he was aggravated and said "I need to go have a smoke, I'm getting killed in here". He left, and the very next hand, the lady beside him was dealt the jackpot . He didn't say much, but you could just tell he just hated life at that very moment because had he not gotten up, it would of been his hand. The man calmly took his cane , his hat, jacket, coffee, and left. The next morning I found out when he did leave he drove his car straight through his bank and was arrested.
5) Slick Robber
I actually give props to people who can actually pull this off. This story may confuse you so I'll try and explain things as best as possible. A lot of casinos have machines as soon as you walk through the front doors. A man walks up to one of these machines and sticks in HIS $100 bill. He doesn't gamble it, instead he hits the cash out button and gets a $100 TITO ticket where he then takes the ticket to the ATM machine to get his $100. Now remember, his Original $100 is in the slot machine. He then takes the $100 from the ATM and goes back to the same machine, and repeats this process over a hundred times. Essentially he's taking money from the ATM, and loading up the Slot Machine . Now he knows he can't do it too much because if the slot machine gets full of money, the machine will shut down and the slow attendant will have to take all the cash out. So he deposits over $10,000 , then has a small crowbar, he cracks the machine open and makes a run out the front door. To my knowledge he was never caught . But damn, that was pretty smart .
EDIT:
6) Mental Health is a thing.
10PM man walks in to play some high limit BlackJack. This guy knows the game and played well. Dressed nice, drank juice/tea , a little bit of a attitude, cashed in over $10,000. When this man was half way down his buy in, he said something a long the lines of "If I don't win here tonight, I'm going to go set myself on fire." I wasn't sure if he was serious because when people are down, they tend to say a lot of nonsense. I actually left early that night, and from a third party was told he did exactly that in the parking lot. The next day it was clear something terrible had gone wrong in the parking lot .
EDIT:
7) Nothing good happens after midnight
After a busy Saturday night, I was dealing a mix of games, and during this story I was in the middle of Blackjack. I had one young kid (probably 19) sitting in the middle, one older male probably in his later 40's sitting beside him on his right, and I had a really nice couple in their 20's sitting together at the other side. This young kid wasn't playing just sort of watching, and ever time the old man won he would give this young guy some of his winnings. The older man, was a wine drinker, and he had black between all of his teeth, I'll never forget. He's a little drunk but nothing terrible. As the night goes on, the older man goes and uses the washroom, at which point the couple asked the young guy "Oh was that your dad?" and the young guy says "Hah, no I wish!". The couple and I just looked at each other. This old guy, was in complete control over this kid. Absolutely disgusting. The night ends, and I find out the couple called a few of their friends, and they all waited outside by this old mans truck and beat the living hell out of him. 40 years old, sleeping with a 19 year old, completely brain washed . Very weird.
8) That one co-worker where you just wish they would quit.
One of our co-workers, nice guy but had a very big ego and we as employees just sorta left him alone. One day he had enough of the atmosphere and quit. Now usually when you quit, you cannot come back until you paperwork is finalized. How ever, HR was in that day, and he was given the paperwork the very next day. He came in, cashed in $1000, and made $50,000 in about a hour at the Baccarat table. My manager, was extremely annoyed, because now this guy is just mocking the casino and having the time of his life (Thanks for the big tip by the way :) ) and so he decides to call it quits. He wants to ban himself and he wants $50,000 in cash. The casino says Nope, we are going to give you a cheque. Now here's the thing, most business people will take the cheque, how ever you CANT CASH the cheque until the following monday because it's on that day where the funds are available. The casino on the other hand will cash their own check in anytime , because they want you to play. So this guy pretty much said go to hell I want my cash, and he called the police. Police show up, and management promptly gave him the cash.I though it was absolutely hilarious .
​
9) No good deed goes un punished
I was dealing Three Card Poker, and the jackpot was around $17,000. This old man (a regular) was sitting there all day grinding it out. Super nice guy, always a pleasure to deal to. Well, after hours of playing, he stands up and says "Hey john!, can you come here for a minute?" so his buddy John comes over. He says to John "I need to go take a piss real quick, can you play my card until I get back?" John agrees . John takes the chips and I stop him and explain he can't play his friends chips, he needs to cash in and play his own. And he does. Welp, second hand out and bam, doesn't he win it. The old man comes back and is so happy, he can't believe it. John, took his $17,000, didn't say a word to his "buddy" and walked away. I never felt so much hatred in all my life. Didn't give him a dollar, not a thank you, nothing. The old man sits back down again, the progressive resets to $2500, and he sat there grinding away again.
10) The Top Knot
I had this player , young guy, who was born into a fortune. One of his relatives passed away and left him a pretty big sizable amount of money, so he played poker every single day for the rest of his days. I will add, he IS a good player. I did not enjoy his company just because of the "Know-it-All" attitude, but he was good. We'll call him John. John is 5'10, and well build, with muscle. John also decided today was the day to show off his Top Knot. (google top knot if you're not sure what I mean) So he sits down, and he's absolutely KILLING the table. Every hand, after hand, after hand. And because he's in such a good mood, he's playing any two cards, calling any $500 bet, and he's just dominating. This one guy at the table decided he had enough. He got up, without saying a word and left. A moment later, he comes back in, walks behind John, and takes a pair of scissors , and cuts off his Top Knot. I for one couldn't believe it, dying laughing inside, and it just turned into one big brawl. That was a good day.
11) That one bad seed
One of my best friends who I haven't seen in YEARS ended up being part of the crew. Was kind of nice to catch up. We never really got along as we grew up because he has a very high picture of himself . He wanted that 10/10 woman. A mansion, and a new Corvette. So every month or so we would all go up to the other casino to play. I myself would bring no more than $500, but I couldn't understand how this guy (we'll call him Kyle) was spending THOUSANDS of dollars at the tables. So this wen on for a few months. Well, one day, as we're closing the casino, he and I are in the High Limit room and we're getting ready to close the tables. We are told to take the chips out, count them, put them back, sign this piece of paper and that's it. Well as the supervisor was locking the tray, the piece of paper fell to the floor, so she asked Kyle to grab the piece of paper. As he bends over, a great big $500 chip falls right out of his sock. Kyle was fired immediately , but it all made sense. They offered Kyle a deal where if he replaced all the stolen chips they would not make it public. Not sure how that turned out.
12) If I ever decide to write a book, this will be the last chapter: <3
After working at my first Casino for five years, I met a Indian woman who was visiting from another part of the country. During this time I was explaining a game to her, which honestly I don't think she even cared. She explained she was visiting and sight seeing , and that was that.Well, two years later I ended up moving to the other side of the country and transferred casinos, and low and behold she worked there as a Dealer. We got married , and it's been 5 years.
13) The Tip
One of our tables that we've had for a couple years had a progressive jackpot that had reached $100,000. The dealer at the table was sitting pretty lonely. Nobody really played the game because people knew it was extremely difficult to win the jackpot. My memory is a tad foggy, but you somehow needed to flop the royal flush. This young guy sits down and says to the dealer, we'll call him John. "John, if you pay me that jackpot, I will tip you $10,000" Well John started dealing, and about a half hour into his shift, he F*cking did it. He dealt him the royal. And you know something?This young lad, kept his word, and he made sure there was a audience, and he tipped exactly $10,000. That was a moment right there. That pay cheque was real nice. I think we all got about $500 more than usual. The moment that jackpot was awarded they got rid of the table because the money it was making was not near what the casino wanted. I'm sure there have been bigger tips at other casinos, but that was something special .
14) The Lawsuit
Now this story I'm going to have to beat around the bush a bit due to the nature of what happened. I can't won't answer any questions that you may have on this topic other than what I have to say because it had a lot of publicity . The waitresses at this casino had to wear very thin sexy clothes. Not borderline legal, but it was noticed. One day they called all the waitresses to come in and explained they were changing their outfit to something even more sexier. Now these new dresses were very very borderline legal . The staff said No way. We're not wearing that.So , friday night comes, and the staff work their whole shift, then at the end of their shift were called into a meeting and were all fired. Welp, one of those ladies father was a pretty big time lawyer. Brough the casino to court and won. They won big. Good for them. We had no waitresses for a couple days haha.
Thanks for reading along, I have many more I can add as the day goes on, those were just some off the top of my head. Feel free to ask any questions of the Casino industry. I don't really have many stories about the surveillance department because that's the one area where I can't really say a whole lot due to its privacy and contracts I was and still am under.
submitted by viodox0259 to TalesFromTheFrontDesk [link] [comments]

League and Poker - learning to lose

I want to preface this post by saying I’m a complete noob at league. I’m 25 and just started playing in the past few months and am currently bronze. However, I’ve been playing poker for years and know a thing or 2 about losing ‘winnable’ situations.
I saw a post earlier today asking how to improve when being up 5+ kills, 50cs, first tower, etc. etc. If you’re that far ahead, you’re going to win more often then not. To quantify, probably 70,80%+ of the time. But 100% of the time? Never. Nothing you do in league will guarantee a win until a team surrenders or the nexus is destroyed.
So how does this correlate to poker? In poker you’re constantly looking to get your money in ahead/ as a favorite. A dream situation for poker players is getting pocket aces- and piling in money as quickly as possible. Worst case scenario you’re a 78% favorite to win before the flop. Other situations you’re an even bigger favorite- sometimes 85/90/98% favorite before the river (the last card that runs out on the board). However, any good player knows that nothing is guaranteed. You can play a hand perfect- get your stack of chips in as a massive favorite- and still lose.
Combining these 2 thoughts we see what pro players in both games do; and that’s put themselves in the best possible situations and accept the results.
Recognizing high points in losses and low points in wins. Taking solace knowing you played a situation near perfectly and got unlucky or being able to self- critique are valuable tools in constantly improving. Remember that for every game you’re an 80% favorite to win and lose, there will probably be an identical situation where you’re getting smacked with a 80% chance to lose- yet somehow clutch it out or get carried to win.
All we can do when playing is our best- and if you play better then your opponent you’ll win more often then not.
submitted by NomNomNomNomNomm to summonerschool [link] [comments]

Turning Random League of Legends Champions into a DnD Build (Attempting) Until I've Done all 152 (and Counting) Day 8: Twisted Fate

If I’m being completely honest, Twisted Fate is probably the hardest time I’ve had trying to figure one of these builds and probably the least confident I’ve been on one, but mama didn’t raise no bitch and I’m shooting my shot.
submitted by BestBaconatorNA to 3d6 [link] [comments]

Adventure: Ship (Ch. 17)

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An ocean of red surrounded him, stretching as far as the eye could see. The landscape was featureless, just a constant crimson that engulfed even the horizon. Picking up a foot he took a step forward, then he felt it, the feeling of something breaking beneath his feet. It reverberated through his leg, the ripples from the disturbed crimson surface spread outwards from him as the feeling spread inwards. He gritted his teeth, the feeling wouldn't relent, the ocean was draining away, a sense of dread filled him, he didn't want to see, he didn't want to know what he stepped on, but it just kept draining. He would see it soon, he would know, he didn't want to, he didn't want to, he didn't want to, he didn't want to, he didn't...
David woke with a start, he was breathing heavily and shaking uncontrollably in a cold sweat. He took a few deep breaths and rubbed his face to wake himself. Just a dream. He brought his breathing back down to normal and looked at the clock on the wall, It was early morning. David sighed and laid his head back down, he would doze a bit till it was a more appropriate time to wake. At least he tried to, he couldn't seem to get even a nap in. Cursing it all he just grabbed the controls for the entertainment system to find something to preoccupy himself.
He swapped through a series of shows over the next couple of hours. He watched recent news for a bit, then a couple of different nature documentaries on various planets, and then a brutal version of football where the players were all remotely piloting heavy robots they could slam around with impunity. Eventually the hospital came to life again and the Vildune doctor entered into his room.
It gave him a quizzical look before speaking. "Oh, you're awake, didn't expect you to be up this early."
David gave a smile in return. "Yeah I guess I'm just an early riser." He turned the entertainment system off so he could properly listen.
"Well since you are up, we could start your final examination so we can get you cleared to leave."
David perked up a bit. "Sounds like a plan to me." The doctor started testing his body, poking, prodding and recording his reflexes. He shined a light in his eyes and questioned it's reflective properties, to which David gave a summarized explanation. The doctor was intrigued but didn't push him for more details, instead continuing with the examination. He finished by having him stand and conducting a basic mobility test. David went through a range of motions and stretches to make sure everything was working as intended.
Content with the tests the doctor had David sit. "Looking good, everything seems to be in order. Do you feel that something's off or otherwise not operating as it should?"
David just shook his head. "No everything feels fine."
The doctor nodded. "Alright, once I submit this form you'll be cleared to leave, if you could just sign here, thank you, any questions?"
Something popped into his head that he had forgotten. "Actually yeah, where did my stuff go?"
"You mean your pants? We were keeping it stored for you after we had it cleaned."
"Was there a blue scale in one of the pockets, do you still have that?" David was getting concerned.
"Yes I believe there was, we stored it with the pants if that's what you are wondering about."
David let out a relieved sigh. "Thanks, I would like that returned to me please."
The doctor nodded. "Of course, a nurse will bring your effects as well as a new printed shirt and pair of shoes."
"Appreciate it doc, thanks again." The doctor gave him a smile then left to file the paperwork. David sat down on the bed again to wait for everything to be processed. It was maybe ten minutes before a nurse showed up to deliver his clothes. The pile was deposited on the bedside with a polite nod, then they left.
David noticed the scale on top and picked it up to examine it again, It still had its luster but the edges were scuffed and scratched now, a testament to its use in his escape. He smiled to himself, I should make this into a necklace or something. He set it aside while he stripped down and got his clothes on. After he was properly dressed he slipped the scale into one pocket and the credit chip into his other before exiting his room.
Stepping into the hall he inhaled deeply, enjoying the freedom that he had missed. A call from down the hallway got his attention as he turned to see Sky and Solomon sitting in some chairs, evidently waiting for him. He smiled and approached to pair who stood to greet him. "Morning Sky, Solomon, were you guys waiting for me?"
"Not for very long." Solomon responded. "We decided it would be appropriate to congratulate you on your release from the hospital."
David chuckled a bit. "Thanks, but it was just one night, no need to stand on ceremony."
Solomon did a 'shrug'. "Well it was that, and Sky here doesn't seem to want to let you out of his sight." Sky snapped to Solomon with a look of betrayal before looking at the ground embarrassed.
David laughed and ruffled his head feathers a bit. Sky actually flinched a little at that, and a needle of sadness pierced David's heart. "Don't worry Sky I'm not going anywhere fast. I got to contact my boss and let them know the situation, then I have to get a new ship, supplies, equipment and a general sense of what I'm going to do next." Sky just nodded and continued staring at the floor. "Well, I'm going to go send a message, so you guys can wait for me at the front if you want."
With a nod they left to wait and David went off at a brisk pace to the public terminals. Following the signs on the walls he found them fairly quickly and signed in to his account. Labeling the message as an emergency situation update, he summarized the events of what transpired to the best of his abilities.
Before he hit send, he hesitated as he thought about something. His boss technically did belong to a branch of the government so maybe they could pull some strings for him. He added a p.s. to his letter asking for a favor and sent off the message. With that done he signed out of everything and left to meet up with Sky and Solomon.
He found them waiting in the lobby and with a wave joined up with them. "Sorry to keep you waiting. So, what's the plan for today then?"
Solomon responded. "I was going to research where I may be needed as a doctor or if there was a hospital that could use my services."
"Well wherever you go they will be lucky to have you. I think I'm going to get a new ship first, if you find out where you want to go, I can give you a lift so you don't have to hire a shuttle."
Solomon raised a manipulator at him. "I don't want to impose on you more than I have already."
David scoffed. "Impose? Come on, you're not imposing. We can just take a jump gate and be anywhere with another orbital station, and even if there wasn't a jump gate it would still be no big deal. Just accept the offer already, you might hurt my feelings if you don't." David got him with that one, his manipulators slumped a bit as he was caught between a rock and a hard place, and he knew it.
"Twist my tentacles why don't you. Fine, I will graciously accept your offer."
David smiled a devious little smile at his success. "Excellent, lets meet up later tonight to talk about things. If I remember correctly, I think there is a bar on level 23 called Zarg's bar 'n grill, sounds plain but they fix up a damn good drink. Lets meet around seven, standard Terran time, tonight for a bit of celebration and planning."
"Sounds good. I take it you are going to stay with David, Sky?" Sky was still embarrassed and just nodded. "Well then, I will see you both later." With that he turned and left leaving the two of them alone.
David turned to Sky who looked at him finally. "Well we should get going and find a new ship." Sky nodded and followed slightly behind him as they walked. They found an unoccupied lift and David set in a command to take them to the market level. Sky was being quiet the whole time and David felt kind of awkward with the little guy just standing there like some kind of attendant.
David decided he should try and start a conversation. "So how are you doing?"
Sky looked up at him quizzically. "What do you mean?"
"I mean with everything that's happened. You doing alright?"
Sky looked back down apparently thinking about it. "I'm not sure, I guess I'm a little nervous. I've never been anywhere but the Dread Throne before, I have no idea what to expect or do."
David bobbed his head a few times. "I see, well don't worry, I think you'll like freedom more than you know." A soft chime sounded in the lift and the door opened to reveal the market, bustling with life as people went to and from different shops and stalls talking to the various vendors selling goods from their planets. The diversity of life in the crowd was always exhilarating. Many different species walking, sliding, crawling, and flying all over the place while talking to the vendors, haggling and buying what they wanted, was energizing to say the least.
David was about to step out of the lift when he felt a hand grab onto his pocket. David looked down to see Sky, wide eyed, staring at the crowd of people like a deer in headlights before blinking a few times and noticing what he did. His hand quickly shot back down to his side and he mumbled a quick "I'm sorry."
David gave him a soft smile. "It's ok, just stay close and you'll be fine." Sky nodded and they exited together. David started weaving through the crowd Sky kept close to his side as he did. David found Sky's reaction to be quite funny as he stared at everything, mouth slightly agape like a little kid. Sky's gaze lingered on a vendor who was selling some hefty looking alien fruits, and David thought he might have saw Sky gulp a little bit at the sight of them.
Why not. David weaved his way over to the vendor with Sky in tow. Stopping in front of the stall the vendor gave him a warm welcome and insisted they buy his merchandise. David, not one to disappoint, scanned over the fruits for a moment before he saw one with good size and color to it. Selecting it from the pile, the merchant presented a device to pay with and David inserted his new chip into it, then scanned his hand. A second later a green light came on and the vendor gave him a polite bow in thanks for the patronage.
David turned back to Sky and presented the fruit to him. His eyes went wide as he stared at it, mouth hanging open, and David thought he might start drooling. He reached for it but stopped part way, hesitating. He looked up and David and asked "Can I?" Icy cold needles of sadness were everywhere in his heart now.
David managed to keep smiling and replied. "Yes, go ahead." Sky grabbed hold of the fruit with both hands and looked upon it like it was the most valuable thing in the world. He opened up and sunk his beak into the fruits flesh, slicing into it with an ease born of his natural affinity towards it's consumption. A look that could only be described as ecstasy flooded across his features as he practically melted on the spot, savoring every ounce of flavor.
David just smiled at his friends, but the sadness ate at his insides. This was probably the first real fruit Sky had eaten since he was a little kid. Anger at the snake bitch rose from the grave, but with nowhere to go, it evaporated into the ether. "Can you eat and walk Sky?" Sky snapped out of his own personal rapture and took a moment to process the question before giving him a quick nod. David smiled and started walking again, making sure he kept an eye on Sky as he ate his fruit so he didn't wander off.
He found a directory at a junction and looked over it for the shipyard. Target located he headed in that direction and into an interior lift which he keyed the correct sub level to go to. Sky had managed to finish an impressive amount of the fruit by the time they stepped out.
The entire level was dedicated to the creation and selling of ships of all shapes and sizes. The reception lobby was all clean polished metal with a large desk manned by three individuals of various species. David walked up to the desk with Sky behind him taking in the sights as he munched on his food.
A polite greeting was had and they asked how they could be of service. "Yes, I'm in the market for a high end exploration ship, powerful scanners, good for long journeys, and preferably a method of self defense." No way was he gonna be caught with his pants literally down again.
The individual talking to him gave him a once over before replying. "Such a ship would be quite expensive sir."
David felt a twinge of irritation, he knew he didn't look great in his plain white shirt and worn pants, but he adopted a smug grin. Pulling over the credit scanner he inserted his chip into it. "Is this enough?"
David watched with immense satisfaction as their eyes widened in surprise and they tripped over themselves trying to apologize. "M...my apologize sir, please follow me we will get you a custom ship to your exact desires." They proceeded to lead the pair down a hallway and into a private room.
The doors money opens, David mused. He sat in a really nice leather chair, Sky just finished the last of his fruit as he sat next to him. The receptionist excused themselves to retrieve a representative that could help them. They waited in the room for a few minutes before the door opened again revealing a four armed biped, Quallexen David believed the name was, fifth seat of the alliance. The light green skin on its body was indicative of the foliage of its planet, it had skin that looked like a lizards, its slender form was incredibly flexible putting even the best of earth contortionists to shame.
It entered and raised an eyebrow at the two of them for a quick moment before adopting its practiced business face. "Hello, my names Cathol, I heard you would like to order a custom ship?"
David nodded. "Indeed, I'd like to see all your options if you wouldn't mind." Cathol walked over and handed them a data-pad prompting a holo-display to appear in the middle of the room, and then sat across from them. David examined the information on the pad, a complete list of ship types, features, and cosmetic preferences. David looked across at the dealer who was apparently not expecting much from the pair. David fought to keep the smug look under control and began to make his selections.
Selecting the newest line of Venture series ships he sifted through the options and saw an impressive list of function and comfort items. He began selecting some of the options such as, nice pilot seats, lounge, gym, fabricator, and fully stocked kitchen. This got another raised eyebrow from Cathol but David wasn't done yet. Moving on to the functional features he specified complete control of the ship from the cockpit, Biometric scanners, Reinforced doors, localized environmental controls for each room, customized suites with one set to the preferences of Aoulooron's and the others defaulted to human preferences, shields as heavy as were allowed on a civilian vessel and equally heavy armament, then finished it off with a few cosmetic changes.
Cathol was now quite surprised by all the selections, but to their credit they did a fairly good job at hiding it. He cleared his throat before speaking. "Well sir, if you are done with your selections I can give you a quote." He used a data-pad of his own and input a few things, then a number appeared that was quite large. David had the money most definitely but his mother would strangle him if he didn't at least try and haggle it down.
"Seriously? I know its custom but I could probably get this same ship at a discount at Atlas station."
Cathol's brow furrowed a bit "Sir I assure you this is an accurate estimate of the price."
Tough cookie huh. "Alright Sky come on, we'll try at the next station." Sky looked slightly confused at what was going on but got up anyway and followed him towards the door.
"Sir, please wait, I can maybe adjust the price a bit for you." He tapped on his pad again and the number was shaved down a little bit.
David walked back into the room a little bit but didn't sit down. "You have my interest, but not my business yet."
"Sir you must be reasonable, this is a tall order to fill."
"I'm not asking for much Cathol, just a price that we can both be happy with at the end of the day." Cathol stared at him for a moment but David was putting on his best poker face. With a sigh Cathol tapped once again on the pad and the number dropped a little again. David gave a smile at the new price. "There we go, that is a more acceptable number." He sat back down in the chair. "Now how soon can I expect this to be done?"
"We have a ship in this model ready, we would just need to add all your preferred features. It should be done by tomorrow afternoon."
"Sounds good to me, where do I sign?" A image appeared on his pad, standard agreement for this kind of deal. He gave a quick once over of the forms and then signed his name at the bottom. Cathol now smiled and stood to offer him a hand, which David took.
"Pleasure doing business with you sir. Your order will arrive at hanger C on the 54th floor after midday tomorrow."
"Thank you Cathol, I will expect it then." Cathol escorted the pair to the exit and saw them off with a polite bow as the lift door closed. David released the tension in his body with a sigh. Sky was looking at him with a questioning look.
"What just happened?" He finally asked.
David chuckled a bit. "It's called haggling Sky, some places let you negotiate on the price, and sometimes you have to be aggressive about it." Sky just thought on it for a second before shaking his head apparently giving up on the concept for the moment. David chuckled again but turned his mind towards stocking his new ship and getting equipment. Time for some shopping.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
As usual let me know what you think down below and of anything that could improve my writing.
submitted by XSevenSins to HFY [link] [comments]

A list of every Unus Annus video name

I made a list of every Unus Annus video name. Posting this here because someone wanted to see it and a comment doesn't allow more than 1000 characters.
​
November 15th - Unus Annus
(note- The Very Start.)
​
November 15th - Cooking with Sex Toys
(note- 365 Days Left)
​
November 16th - Purging Our Sins with a Net Pot
​
November 17th - Hot Dog'd to Death
​
November 18th - Making Our Own Sensory Deprivation Tank
​
November 19th - The Good Kind of Cupping
​
November 20th - The Bad Kind of Cupping
​
November 21st - The Worst Kind of Cupping
​
November 22nd - Ethan Will Be Kicked in the Balls
​
November 23rd - Doing Each Other's Makeup in the Dark
​
November 24th - Baby Hands Operation
​
November 25th - Mark and Ethan Summon a Ghost
​
November 26th - 2 Truths and 1 Lie -- Waxing Edition
​
November 27th - Poopsie Sparkly Critters (a slime surpise...)
​
November 28th - Play-Doh Thanksgiving
​
November 29th - Helium Therapy
​
November 30th - Drawing Memes From Memory
​
December 1st - 1 Man 100 Accents
​
December 2nd - An A.I. Predicts How We're Going to Die
​
December 3rd - Mark Turns Ethan into a Mummy to Prepare Him for the Great Beyond
​
December 4th - The Cubby Gummy Challenge
​
December 5th - We Buy a Professional Hypnosis Video and React To It
​
December 6th - Mark and Ethan Attempt and Escape Room
​
December 7th - Ethan Destroys Mark's Van with a Bat
​
December 8th - There's Still Hope...
​
December 9th - Ethan Gives Mark a Viking Funeral
​
December 10th - The Great Meat Mistake
​
December 11th - Acupuncture Is NOT Painful
​
December 12th - Floating in a Real Sensory Deprivation Tank
​
December 13th - Mark Reviews The Impossible Burger But There's a Looming Sense of Impending Doom
(note- Paintball gun)
​
December 14th - We Made Nude Pictures of Eachother
​
December 15th - You made Beautiful Music for The Barrel... But Only One Could Win
​
December 16th - We Had To Drink Each Other's Pee
(note- The first of the Pee Trilogy)
​
December 17th - Ethan Explores Mark's Haunted Basement
​
December 18th - Giving Away Our 1,000,000 Subscriber Gold Play Button
​
December 19th - Ethan's Relaxing and Totally Normal Naul Salon
​
December 20th - Taped and Afraid
​
December 21st - What Was The Most Painful Thing We've Ever Endured?
​
December 22nd - Donating Toys to charity w/ JackSepticEye
​
December 23rd - Harnessing Our Dogs' Unlimited Energy
​
December 24th - Santa's Mukbang (Drinking 1 Gallon of Eggnog)
​
December 25th - Forcibly Turning Mark Into Santa Claus Against His Will
​
December 26th - Preserving Ourselves In Wax
(note- JackSepticEye was also here!)
​
December 27th - Beating Inanimate Objects to Death
​
December 28th - Emotional Pain vs Physical Pain... Which is worse?
​
December 29th - Duct Tape Crusifixion (Amy, Please Don't Watch This Video)
​
December 30th - You Blink You Lose
​
December 31th - 2 Grown Men Attempt the Presidential Fitness Test
​
January 1st - We Took The Polar Plunge
​
Janurary 2nd - Hiding Out Sins from Amy's Holy Peepers
​
January 3rd - We Eat Bugs
​
January 4th - DIY Bungee Jump (Please don't try this)
(note- Disclamer Song Origin)
​
January 5th - We Have The BEST Thumbnails on Youtube and No One Can Tell Us Otherwise
​
January 6th - Who Can Make Themselves Taller?
​
January 7th - The Sensory Overload Tank
​
January 8th - Recreating Ourselves as a Cursed Mannequin
​
January 9th - We Took an IQ Test
​
January 10th - Ethan Fianlly Becomes a MAN
​
January 11th - Mark and Ethan Go Casket Shopping
​
January 12th - We Take a Lie Detector Test to Uncover Our Darkest Sins
​
January 13th - Learning to Breathe Underwater
​
January 14th - Fixing Mark's Hole with Ramen but Every Time We Add Glue We Get 5% Closer to God
(note- The hole made in the video where Mark punched a hole in the wall)
​
January 15th - Mark Steals Ethan's Face
​
January 16th - You Breathe You Die
​
January 17th - 2 Absolute Beginners Experience the Dancing Glory that is Salsa
​
January 18th - DIY Geriatric Simulator
​
January 19th - This Is How We'll Die...
​
January 20th - We Cryogenically Freeze Ourselves
​
January 21st - This is What Being Tased Feels Like
​
January 22nd - What Happens When A Youtube Channel Dies?
​
January 23rd - Bad Bad Beans
​
January 24th - We hired a Real Hypnotherapist to Analyze Our Darkest Dreams
​
January 25th - We Turned Our Bodies Into Art
(note- painting each other naked)
​
January 26th - Mark and Ethan Lean About The Human Body
​
January 27th - Mark Punishes Ethan
​
January 28th - Strange (and legal) Things You Can Do With Your Body After Death
​
January 29th - DIY Cheese
​
January 30th - Hacking The Very Fabric of the Universe
​
January 31st - Looking at Long Lost Memes
​
February 1st - Discovering the Secret to Eternal Life
​
February 2nd - Turning Mark Into an E-Boy
​
February 3rd - Ethan Redefines Male Beauty
​
February 4th - Professional Fire Cupping (Going Even Further Beyond)
​
February 5th - An Extremely Sour, Not-at-all Sour Meal
​
February 6th - Literally Eating Fire
​
February 7th - Unregulated Axe Throwing
​
February 8th - Literally Laying On Broken Glass
​
February 9th - Making an Indoor Tornado to Flex on Mother Nature
​
February 10th - Nutball: The Most Dangerous Game
(note- First of the Nutball Trilogy)
​
February 11th - Becoming a Master of Mime
​
February 12th - Discussing the Idea of Murdering Each Other bit It's Just a Joke and Definitely Not Serious Haha
​
February 13th - Are We Already Dead?
​
February 14th - Our Perfect (and last) Valentine's Day
​
February 15th - Drunk College Party Simulator
​
February 16th - 10 Strange Amazon Paroducts Ethan Bought Mark Because He Doesn't Know How To Spend Money Responsibly
​
February 17th - Chickens Teach Us About Life and Death
​
February 18th - 3 Big Boys Attempt the Kings Royal Fitness Test
​
February 19th - Being Attacked by a Fully Trained Bodyguard Dog
​
February 20th - Learning the Ancient Art of Chinese Archery
​
February 21st - The Ultimate Trolley Problem
​
February 22nd - Goat Yoga
​
February 23rd - Edible Slime was a Mistake
​
February 24th - Granting Acces Into Heaven's Sweet Gates
​
February 25th - Long Hair, Do We Dare?
(note- With Marks Quarintine Hair, yes, he did dare)
​
February 26th - We Wrote a Hit Pop Song in 30 Minutes
​
February 27th - Mark and Ethan go on a "Drum Date"
​
February 28th - Blowing Our Souls Into Some Hot Glass
​
February 29th - Top 10 Worst Things Your Friend Could Possibly Spend Their Money On
​
March 1st - Nutball Extreme: Taser Edition
(note- Second of the Nutball Trilogy)
​
March 2nd - REAL Ghost Hunting at an Abandoned Zoo
​
March 3rd - We Bought a Camera That Can Look Inside Us
​
March 4th - Becoming the World's Greatest DJs
​
March 5th - Who Can Teach Their Dog a Trick the Fastest?
​
March 6th - Middle School Science Experiment Teaches Us About Life and Death
(note- Owl pellets)
​
March 7th - DIY Chiropractor
​
March 8th - Mark and Ethan Get Into a Fight
​
March 9th - The Barrel - Offical Music Video
​
March 10th - We Got Pepper Sprayed
​
March 11th - We Give Each Other Tattoos Blindfolded
​
March 12th - What Does Astrology Say About Our Friendship?
​
March 13th - Mark and Ethan Get a Full Body Scan to See What Secrets Lay Hidden Within (and learn their body fat)
​
March 14th - Mark Needs To Rub Ethan and Only His Mom Can Help Him
​
March 15th - 2 Idiots Get Crushed by 18-Foot Giant Snakes
​
March 16th - Beer Sauna: Turning a Portable Sauna into a Portable Hell
(note- The video where Pee Sauna was first mentioned)
​
March 17th - Mark and Ethan Hunt The World's Most Wanted Criminals
​
March 18th - Unus Annus Carves the Roast Beast
​
March 19th - 5 Weird Apps That Predicted Our Death
​
March 20th - We Tried a Labor Pain Simulator
​
March 21st - Recreating the Miracle of Childbirth
​
March 22nd - Mark and Ethan Are Now Fathers
​
March 23rd - We Force James Charles to Run a Military Obstacle Course
​
March 24th - Desperately Trying To Not Touch Our Faces
(note- Start of Quarintine videos)
​
March 25th - Reddit 50/50: Two Player Edition
​
March 26th - Going on an Internet Scavenger Hunt
​
March 27th - Having an Adventure In VR Chat Becuase We Can't Go Outside
​
March 28th - Amazon Shopping for the Apocalypse
​
March 29th - Whom Would Eat Whomst First in a Zombie Apocalypse?
​
March 30th - Ultimate Youtuber Boxing Showdown
​
March 31st - The Deep End of Omegle: Risky Boogalo
(note- This video was deleted for an unknown reason)
​
April 1st - Where in the World is Unus Annus?
(note- Timer was at 401 days)
​
April 2nd - Mark Builds a Pillow Fort for the Very First Time
​
April 3rd - Mark's 1 Weird Talent Leaves Ethan Absolutely Speechless
​
April 4th - Wikifeet: A Tale of 2 Tootsies
​
April 5th - We Made Every YouTuber Battle in the Hunger Games
​
April 6th - We Google Each Other to Find Our Darkest Forgotten Sins
​
April 7th - We Played Mad Libs and Ran It Through Google Translate
​
April 8th - Mark and Ethan Desperately Try and Nae a Single State in the USA
​
April 9th - Speed Reading 1000+ WPM To Gain a Complete Understanding of All Human Knowledge
​
April 10th - What is the Least Viewed Video on YouTube
​
April 11th - We Found Websites That The World Forgot About
​
April 12th - The Scariest True Stories on the Internet
​
April 13th - How to NOT be the Perfect Boyfriend
​
April 14th - Mark and Ethan Find The Lost City of EL Dorado
​
April 15th - Mark and Ethan Bet Everything on a Wikipedia Race
​
April 16th - The Creepiest Videos on Youtube
​
April 17th - Help Us Break a YouTube World Record
(note- The birth of Norbert Moses. The video was called "Subscribe to Norbert Moses")
​
April 18th - 2 Men 200 Accents
​
April 19th - The Illuminati... Do They Really Exist?
​
April 20th - Using Google Maps to Find the Lost City of Atlantis
​
April 21st - Reading YOUR Scariest True Stories
​
April 22nd - Mark and Ethan Take a Personality Test
​
April 23rd - Will AI Soon Take Over Humanity As We Know It?
​
April 24th - Running Internet Drama through Google Translate
​
April 25th - The Secret Unus Annus NO-Touchy-Touchy Hand Shake
​
April 26th - Two Male Men Judge Female Women on Their Beauty
​
April 27th - Bored? Press This Button.
​
April 28th - Don't Go in the Ocean... Ever.
​
April 29th - We Explore the Most MYSTERIOUS Mysteries of our Wildy Mysterious Mystery Moon of Mysteries
​
April 30th - We Looked at Unus Annus Memes
​
May 1st - Is Mark a Masochist?
(note- yes.)
​
May 2nd - What the Hell is a Pink Trombone?
​
May 3rd - Professional Fetish Scientists Rank the Best/Worst Fetishes of 2020
​
May 4th - Mark and Ethan Desperately Attempt to Feel Something
​
May 5th - An A.I. Generates Out Worst Nightmare
​
May 6th - Are Reptilian Humanoids Living Among us?
​
May 7th - Like It or Not... This is What The New Human Looks Like
​
May 8th - Eating Only Onions for 24 Hours: How Many Onions Does it Take to Kill a Man?
​
May 9th - Unus Annus ASMR
​
May 10th - We Attempted to Create THICC Water
​
May 11th - Making Our Own Gravestones to Prepare For Our Inevitable Demise
​
May 12th - How Tall Can A Human Get?: An Impartial Review by 2 Average Height Men
​
May 13th - Mark Teaches Ethan Korean
​
May 14th - Bigfoot is Real and It Ate My Friend
​
May 15th - The End of Unus Annus is Almost Here...
(note- The Halfway point)
​
May 16th - We Explore the Unus Annus Subreddit for Your Delicious Memes
​
May 17th - How Big Can a Nuke Get?
​
May 18th - How Much Caffeine Does It Take to Kill a Man?
​
May 19th - Drinking Real THICC Water... How Bad Does It Taste?
​
May 20th - We Played Strip Poker
(note- Mark lost so badly. Ethan also cheated on the first game)
​
May 21st - Harnessing Our Yodeling Power to End the World aAs We Know It
​
May 22nd - Mark Cooks Blindfolded While Ethan Guides Him Through FaceTime
​
May 23rd - We Played the Newlywed Game While Consuimg That Which Will Kill the Other
​
May 24th - DIY Boob
​
May 25th - We Have the Best Bellies on Youtube
​
May 26th - The Unus Annus Confessional Booth
​
May 27th - DO NOT OPEN UNTIL 2080
(note- Mark will be 90 and Ethan will be 83)
​
May 28th - Only UNUS-es May Watch This Video
(note- Unus vs Annus. Most Likes to Win.)
​
May 28th - Only ANNUS-es May Watch This Video
(note- Annus vs Unus. Most Likes to Win.)
​
May 29th - Only Watch from 2:15 to 6:11 --- DO NOT WATCH ANY OTHER PART OF THE VIDEO
(note- Annus Won)
​
May 30th - DIY Wine
​
May 31st - Tearing a Phone Book in Half with Our Huge Manly Muscles
​
June 1st - 2 Complete Amateurs Enter a Body Building Competition
​
June 2nd - BLACK LIVES MATTER. Resources and How You Can Help in the Description.
(note- This video was 8 Minutes and 47 seconds of silence)
​
June 3rd - Crushing Watermelons Betwixt Our Mighty Thighs
​
June 4th - Morphing Our Bodies Into Superhero Poses
​
June 5th - Reacting to Your Hilarious Green Screen Memes
​
June 6th - Mark Teaches Ethan to Read with Hooked on Phonics
​
June 7th - Ethan Roasts Mark of 15 Minutes Straight
​
June 8th - There's Something Horribly Wrong with This Picture...
(note- When they made their own creepy photos)
​
June 9th - Attempting to Build IKEA Furniture Without Instructions
​
June 10th - Mark and Ethan Become United State Citizens
​
June 11th - We Made Fanart for Each Other
​
June 12th - Our Fans Try and Scare Us with Their Homemade Creepypasta
​
June 13th - Recreating Childhood Photos
​
June 14th - Will We Break the Boards... Or Will They Break Us?
​
June 15th - Finding the Most Cursed Image on the Internet
​
June 16th - Learning to Cry on Command to Increase Our YouTube Views
​
June 17th - Pee Sauna
(note- The end of quarintine videos. Second of the Pee Trilogy)
​
June 18th - Building IKEA's Hardest Piece of Furniture Without Instruction is Impossible
​
June 19th - Becoming One With the Horse
​
June 20th - The Ultimate Paper Airplane Showdown
​
June 21st - Creating Mark FISHbach
(note- Origin of Mermer
​
June 22nd - Leaning How to Lock Pick (FBI Please Don't Watch)
​
June 23rd - The Most Dangerous Shave
​
June 24th - Ethan Traps Mark's Soul in the Palm of his Hand
​
June 25th - Bear Trapping 101: An Elegant Knot For An Elegant Beast
​
June 26th - 2 Men In a Trench Coat Teach You How to Save Money at the Movies
​
June 27th - Building the World's First IKEA Boat
​
June 28th - Ethan Teaches Mark How to Swim
​
June 29th - 10 Miracle Products to Give YOU the Thiccest Jaw on Planet Earth
​
June 30th - 2 Dirty Boys Wash Their Filthy Mouths Out with Soap
​
July 1st - Mark is Guilty. Ethan Has the Proof.
​
July 2nd - Recreating Mark's Childhood
​
July 3rd - We Put an Apple Watch in a Rock Tumbler
​
July 4th - Dummy Thicc for Dummies | A Tale of 2 Butts | Pushing Our Butts Even Further Beyond
​
July 5th - Reverse Engineering a Kite to Steal the Idea of Electricity From Benjamin Franklin
​
July 6th - The Candy Bra Challenge
​
July 7th - Mark and Ethan Look at a Puppy for 10 Minutes
​
July 8th - Unus Annus Try Pole Dancing
​
July 9th - This Is Hiding On Your Body RIGHT NOW.
​
July 10th - Tasting Weird Food Combos: Pickles and Chocolate? Ice Cream and Soy Sauce?
​
July 11th - The Unus Annus Space Program
​
July 12th - The Egg Smashing Game
​
July 13th - Can You Bake a Cookie from Cookie Dough Ice Cream?
​
July 14th - Bleachus Annus
​
July 15th - Dunking Oreos In Literally Anything But Milk
​
July 16th - Preparing a 5-Star Meal for Our Youtube Famous Dogs
​
July 17th - DIY Teeth
​
July 18th - How to Escape from a Hostage Situation
​
July 19th - Does This Magnetic Skincare Routine Really Work?
​
July 20th - DIY Bed of Nails : OH GOD, PLEASE DON'T EVER TRY THIS
​
July 21st - The Human Mop
​
July 22nd - Can Sound Therapy Heal All Wounds?
​
July 23rd - This Is The Most Dangerous Children's Toy Ever Made
​
July 24th - Would Chica Save Us From Drowning?
​
July 25th - We Do It Better Than Icarus Ever Could
​
July 26th - The Beginning of The End
(note- 110 days left. Start of the Desert videos)
​
July 27th - The Annual Unus Annus Dunk Contest
​
July 28th - Ultimate Horseshoes
​
July 29th - A Serious Conversation Under the Stars
(note- Last of the Desert videos)
​
July 30th - Recharging Our Phones Using Only Brute Strength
​
July 31st - 5 Products to Grow Your Patchy Beard
​
August 1st - Mark Teaches Ethan How to Play the Trumpet
​
August 2nd - Playing Cards: The World's Deadliest Weapon
​
August 3rd - We Lubed Our Floor For a Sliding Competition
​
August 4th - Breaking Glass With Our Screams
​
August 5th - This is Goodbye
(note- 100 Days Left)
​
August 6th - Mark and Ethan Share a Drink
​
August 7th - The Wubble
​
August 8th - Mark and Ethan Shave Chica
​
August 9th - DO NOT TRY THIS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
​
August 10th - Judging Your Terrible Unus Annus Ideas
​
August 11th - Hydro Dipping a Baby
​
August 12th - Popping Popcorn with a High-Powered Laser
​
August 13th - Puberty Simulator
​
August 14th - Grip Strength Test: Loser Becomes the Winner's Butler for a Day
(note- Ethan "won" but Mark never became his Butler)
​
August 15th - Transforming Mark into the 8th Wonder of the World
​
August 16th - Momiplier Teaches Self-Defense
​
August 17th - Playing Children's Games in Total Darkness
​
August 18th - We're Better Than Dogs
​
August 19th - The Koala Challenge: TikTok's Intimate Couple's Trend
​
August 20th - 1 Gallon of Jello Nearly Broke Us
​
August 21st - Too Many Pickles
(note- The Video before the start of Camp Unus Annus)
​
August 22nd - Pitching a Tent in the Woods But There's a Bear 15 Feet Away
(note- Start of Camp Unus Annus. Mark was Blind while Ethan was Deaf)
​
August 23rd - How to Rescue a Cat from a Tree
​
August 24th - A Bear Attacked Us in the Middle of the Night
​
August 25th - How to Safely Bury Your Friend
​
August 26th - Team Building for 2: Trust Fall, Tug-of-War, and More!
​
August 27th - How to Start a Fire (except don't...)
(note- The infamous video where Unus appears at the window before Mark kills Ethan)
​
August 28th - Mark's Outdoor Escape Room
​
August 29th - Hunting HeeHoo
​
August 30th - Was 2020 a Bad Year for Unus Annus?
(note- End of Camp Unus Annus)
​
August 31st - Mark Gives Ethan a HOT (stone) Massage
​
September 1st - We Smell Every Smell
​
September 2nd - How Many Slaps Does It Take to Cook a Chicken?
​
September 3rd - 2 Boys 2 Poops
​
September 4th - Mark Teaches Ethan How to March in a Marching Band
​
September 5th - We Finally Drank Our DIY Wine
​
September 6th - 2 Adults Take a 4th Grade Math Test
​
September 7th - Making Snow Cones With Literally Anything but Normal Flavors
​
September 8th - We Attempts Pottery Without Amy's Help
​
September 9th - Can Plants Feel Pain?
​
September 10th - How Far Can We Chuck a 16lbs Rock?
​
September 11th - We Pierced Each Other's Ears
​
September 12th - We Ate Dog Treats So You Don't Have To
​
September 13th - We Accidentally Made an SCP While Amy Was Away
​
September 14th - BEYBLADE NUTBALL
(note- The Finale of the Nutball Trilogy)
​
September 15th - Making the Ultimate Unus Annus Burger
​
September 16th - Making Soda With Literally Anything But Soda
​
September 17th - Pee Soda
(note- The Finale of the Pee Trilogy)
​
September 18th - Learning to Use The Force
​
September 19th - Brick Soccer
​
September 20th - We Attempt to Make Holy Water
​
September 21st - Amy Sent Us a Mystery Box
​
September 22nd - Mark Knows What Ethan Did...
(note- Ethan cheated on the Grip Test Video)
​
September 23rd - This Video Will Never Make Sense
​
September 24th - We Attempt to Make UNHOLY Water
​
September 25h - We Will Churn Thy Butter
​
September 26th - Ethan Teaches Mark Gymnastics
​
September 27th - The Great Ice Cream Cake Race
​
September 28th - Mark Teaches Ethan to Wrestle
​
September 29th - Ethan Watches as Mark Achieves the Impossible
​
September 30th - Consuming the World's Hottest Chip
​
October 1st - This Video Went Completely Out of Control
​
October 2nd - The 1000 High Five Challenge
​
October 3rd - Bobbing For Apples But the Water Keeps Getting Thiccer
​
October 4th - Mark Breaks His Nose On An Aerial Hoop
(note- Was the second time in one week)
​
October 5th - Mark and Ethan Milk a Goat
​
October 6th - Shooting Archery ON A HORSE
​
October 7th - DIY Minesweeper
​
October 8th - Literally Finding a needle in a Haystack
​
October 9th - Drawing on Each Other's Backs in Total Darkness
​
October 10th - This is For FUN and NOT a Fetish
(note- They were in black bags with a vacuum to such out the air)
​
October 11th - Mark Conquers His Fear of Night Swimming
(note- Birth of the Gongoozler)
​
October 12th - The Painful Wolrd of Aerial Silks
​
October 13th - We Bought Every Grinch Costume on Ebay
​
October 14th - Pumpkin Taste Tier List
​
October 15th - Learn to Jump Higher in 16 Minutes and 16 Seconds
​
October 16th - Bobbing for Literally Anything but Apples
​
October 17th - This Video is Completely Unedited
(note- This is the video where they shoved Wax up their nose and Marks got stuck)
​
October 18th - Momiplier Tells Us True Scary Stories from Korea
​
October 19th - Pumpkin Spice "Challenge"
(note- Similar to the Cinnamon Challenge excpet with Pumpkin Spice and don't do this please)
​
October 20th - Mark and Ethan Build a Scarecrow
​
October 21st - Preassure Waching Our Sins Away
​
October 22nd - We Force Mark to Swin in the Ocean (HIS GREATEST FEAR)
(note- First of the Two Boat videos)
​
October 23rd - Fighting Fish to the Deathin in the Deep Blue Sea
(note- Second of the Two Boat Videos
​
October 24th - Cryptid Olympics
​
October 25th - Phasmophobia in Real Life
(note- Ghost hunt time)
​
October 26th - Edward Pumpkin Hands
(note- First Video in big spooky house)
​
October 27th - Blood Bath
​
October 28th - The Unus Annus Annual Costume Contest
(note- Second Video in big spooky house)
​
October 29th - Ethan Turns Mark into a Werewolf
​
October 30th - Ethan Kidnapped Mark
(note- Third Video in big spooky house. Ethan made Mark an escape room)
​
October 31st - The Truth of Unus Annus
(note- Final Video in the big house. They open the Custom Coffin and change from their clothes into their suits. 13 Days Left)
​
November 1st - Accepting the Truth
(note- They Accept they are going to die. They remain in their suits from this point onward)
​
November 2nd - The Unus Annus Last Supper
​
November 3rd - Being Brutally Honest with Each Other
(note- Mark cries)
​
November 4th - Recreating Every Single Unus Annus Video
(note- 45 minutes and 11 seconds. Longest video)
​
November 5th - All Our Video Ideas That Never Happened
​
November 6th - Who's Cutting Onions In Here???
​
November 7th - The 1st Annual Unus Annus Roast
​
November 8th - God's Fitness Test
​
November 9th - Saying Goodbye to All Our Guests
​
November 10th - Everything's Legal If You're Dead
(note- Cooking with Sex Toys 2)
​
November 11th - 7 Minutes in Heaven | 7 Minutes in Hell
(note- Ethan got heaven, Mark got hell)
​
November 12th - The Unus Annus Annual Sleepover
(note- The final video.)
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November 13th - Goodbye.
(note- The final livestream.)
submitted by shayworld to MementoUnusAnnus [link] [comments]

Examining the Giants’ 2018 ‘miscalculations’ and their ongoing impact - The Athletic

Giants co-owner John Mara recently conceded what has been painfully obvious for three years.
“We definitely made some miscalculations in a number of areas in 2018,” Mara said after the Giants wrapped up the 2020 season.
Mara pinned Dave Gettleman’s 15-33 record in three seasons as general manager on those 2018 miscalculations. As a result, Mara is sticking with Gettleman for a fourth season due to greatly improved personnel moves last offseason.
Despite Mara’s clean slate, the Giants are still feeling the effects of the 2018 offseason. Every decision in roster building has a lasting impact and it has taken years to dig out from some of the misses Gettleman made in his first year on the job.
The Giants made a number of franchise-altering moves in 2018 and Mara didn’t specify which ones he viewed as miscalculations. So here’s an examination of the big moves from the 2018 offseason, why they didn’t work and how their impact has been felt in subsequent years.
• Sticking with Eli Manning
Quarterback Eli Manning was 37 years old and clearly in decline when Gettleman was hired. Manning had two years remaining on his contract, but the Giants could have cut him to create $9.8 million in cap savings while eating $12.4 million in dead money in 2018.
That was always a long shot and Gettleman made it clear that Manning was part of the plans in his introductory news conference, referencing a big game the quarterback had against the Eagles late in the 2017 season as evidence that the two-time Super Bowl MVP could still get the job done.
Would ownership have hired a general manager who advocated dumping Manning? Probably not. But Mara was adamant that there was no ownership mandate for Gettleman to make decisions geared toward one last run with Manning.
“That’s absolute nonsense,” Mara said last week.
In hindsight, cutting ties with Manning before the 2018 season would have been best for the future but it obviously would have been difficult to dump a franchise icon. But without even adding a successor in 2018, the Giants stuck with Manning again in 2019.
Cutting Manning in the 2019 offseason would have created $17 million in cap savings with just $6.2 million in dead money. The Giants, of course, took Daniel Jones with the sixth pick in the 2019 draft and he took over as the starter in Week 3 of his rookie season. Carrying Manning’s $23.2 million cap hit as a backup quarterback in 2019 was a poor use of resources.
• Signing Nate Solder
Even if there was pressure to build around Manning, Gettleman bears responsibility for the moves made with that objective in mind. Mara isn’t hands-on to the point where he dictates which specific players must be signed.
Signing left tackle Nate Solder to a four-year, $62 million contract with $34.8 million guaranteed was a gross miscalculation.
The Giants had a dire need at left tackle and Solder was the best option on the market. Anyone with a wi-fi connection knew that. But general managers don’t make seven-figure salaries for giving the biggest contracts to the biggest available names.
General managers earn their keep by evaluating all of the options and making decisions that give their team an advantage. Just look at what Solder’s former team did.
The Patriots determined Solder wasn’t worth the contract offered by the Giants despite seven solid seasons in New England. So the Patriots let Solder walk in free agency and traded a third-round pick to the 49ers for Trent Brown and a fifth-round pick. Brown counted just $1.9 million against the cap in 2018 and the Patriots didn’t miss a beat when he was plugged in at left tackle. In the process, the Patriots got a third-round compensatory pick in 2019 for Solder.
The takeaway: There’s always another option, so saying, “What else was Gettleman supposed to do?” isn’t an excuse for the Solder signing. And Gettleman had to have a Plan B at left tackle since the Giants’ top offensive line target in 2018 was guard Andrew Norwell, who signed a five-year, $66.5 million contract with the Jaguars. Once the Giants missed out on Norwell, they went all-in on Solder, which obviously hasn’t worked out.
Solder’s contract leaves the Giants in a tough spot after two disappointing seasons and an opt out for 2020. The Giants compounded the financial consequences by restructuring Solder’s contract before the 2019 season to create cap space. That move created $5 million in cap space in 2019 but added $2.5 million to the cap in the final two years of his deal.
Solder counted $5.6 million against the cap in 2020 during his opt out. He has cap hits of $16.5 million in 2021 and $18 million in 2022. The Giants can cut Solder this offseason to create $6 million in cap savings while eating $10.5 million in dead money.
The bottom line is the Solder contract was a major miscalculation and it continues to be a drain on the Giants’ finances.
• Other free agent signings
Whereas Solder was grossly overpaid, Gettleman’s other notable free agent signings in 2018 were simply poor evaluations.
Signing guard Patrick Omameh to a three-year, $15 million contract seemed reasonable. But the veteran was such a disaster that he was benched after six games and cut in Week 10 of his first season.
Linebacker Kareem Martin, who had familiarity with defensive coordinator James Bettcher from their time together in Arizona, was signed to a three-year, $15 million contract. Martin failed to make an impact in two seasons and was cut last offseason.
Giving running back Jonathan Stewart a two-year, $6.8 million contract wasn’t a big deal in terms of the cap implications. But Gettleman’s obstinate defense that the 31-year-old back hadn’t lost a step chipped away at his credibility when Stewart clearly had nothing left and was cut after one season.
In an ideal world, Omameh and Martin would have been established veteran starters on the 2020 roster. Instead, both were long gone. Misses happen in free agency. But it hurts that Gettleman signed them rather than keeping better players like Devon Kennard and Romeo Okwara, who have been far more productive with other teams since 2018.
• Trading for Ogletree
Like with the Solder signing, the Giants had a need at middle linebacker. So Gettleman took a big swing, sending 2018 fourth and sixth-round picks to the Rams for Alec Ogletree and a 2019 seventh-round pick.
It should have been a red flag that the Rams were looking to deal the 26-year-old Ogletree within a year of giving him a four-year, $42.75 million extension. Ogletree’s five interceptions in 2018 masked otherwise poor play. He struggled again in 2019 and was a cap casualty last offseason.
In all, Ogletree cost the Giants $20 million against the cap for two subpar seasons and a mid-round draft pick. Rebuilding teams shouldn’t give away draft picks and they should be cautious about adding high-priced veterans. The Giants violated both of those tenets with the Ogletree trade.
The Giants got it right at middle linebacker last offseason by signing Blake Martinez to a three-year, $30.75 million contract. If Gettleman had found a similar player in 2018, the Giants would have had better linebacker play in 2018 and 2019 plus an additional mid-round draft pick to develop.
• Trading JPP
The lone move Gettleman made during the 2018 offseason with the future in mind was trading defensive end Jason Pierre-Paul to the Buccaneers for a third-round pick. The trade came a year after former GM Jerry Reese gave Pierre-Paul a four-year, $62 million contract.
The trade left $15 million in dead money on the 2018 cap, but cleared a combined $37 million in cap charges off the books in 2019 and 2020. The Giants used the third-round pick on B.J. Hill, who had 5.5 sacks as a rookie and remains a solid rotational defensive tackle.
This trade looks worse in hindsight since Pierre-Paul has 30.5 sacks in the three seasons since the trade, which is tied for eighth-most in the NFL during that stretch. But dumping an aging player with a big contract for a draft pick wouldn’t have been a bad move if the Giants were rebuilding. The bigger problem is Gettleman’s inability to find a comparable replacement over the past three years.
• Picking Saquon
Using the No. 2 pick in the 2018 draft on running back Saquon Barkley is the decision that had the greatest impact on the franchise. The second pick is an incredibly valuable commodity that can make a seismic impact on a franchise, like when the Giants took Lawrence Taylor at No. 2 in 1981.
As Gettleman said, everyone saw him “drool all over myself” when evaluating Barkley in the pre-draft process. Barkley is supremely talented, but one of the main arguments against using a premium resource on a running back has been realized, since injuries have limited Barkley to just 31 of 48 career games.
The obvious alternative was taking a quarterback. It’s impossible to know how that would have turned out. No. 3 pick Sam Darnold has been a disappointment for the Jets, who may move on this offseason. No. 7 pick Josh Allen was a second-team All-Pro this season after a breakout Year 3 for the Bills. No. 10 pick Josh Rosen has been a complete flop and is already on his fourth team. So clearly there were a wide range of outcomes if the Giants took a quarterback instead of Barkley.
If the Giants took Allen and built a strong supporting cast around him like Buffalo has, maybe they’d be playing in the divisional round this weekend. And if they took Rosen, they’d probably already be back in the market for another quarterback.
The other option was trading back. We’ll never know if Gettleman could have received the package the Jets sent the Colts for the No. 3 pick (the No. 6 pick, two second-round picks in 2018, one second-round pick in 2019). Maybe if Gettleman had a better poker face about his commitment to Manning and infatuation with Barkley, the Jets would have been compelled to trade up to No. 2 to avoid having the Giants beat them to Darnold. But Gettleman admitted to never seriously considering offers for the pick because he was so dead set on taking Barkley.
The Colts took a three-time first-team All-Pro guard (No. 6 pick Quenton Nelson) and an excellent right tackle (No. 37 pick Braden Smith) with the first two picks from the Jets. They then traded the other second-round pick (No. 49) to the Eagles for the 52nd pick (edge rusher Kemoko Turay) and the 169th pick (running back Jordan Wilkins). They then used the 2019 second-round pick from the Jets (No. 34 overall) on cornerback Rock Ya-Sin. Turning the No. 3 pick into two stud offensive linemen, a starting cornerback, a rotational pass rusher and a backup running back is a master class in maximizing value.
Gettleman and Mara don’t view the Barkley pick as a mistake.
“I’m still happy that we have him,” Mara said last week. “I certainly expect him to be a Giant for a very long time.”
Again, we’ll never know if Gettleman could have secured the same offer or something similar to what the Colts landed for the third pick. But it’s tough to stomach how the team directly behind the Giants in the 2018 draft got so much more out of their premium pick.
• Extending Odell
Giving wide receiver Odell Beckham Jr. a five-year, $90 million extension during training camp was the last big move of the 2018 offseason. There were rumors that the Giants could trade Beckham during the 2018 offseason, but they didn’t have much of a choice regarding an extension once they kept him.
Beckham had been a good soldier throughout the 2018 offseason so they rewarded him with the monster contract. Playing hardball with the team’s best player would have made for a rough start to first-year head coach Pat Shurmur’s tenure.
The Giants clearly had regrets, as they dealt Beckham to the Browns for safety Jabrill Peppers, a first-round pick and third-round pick after the season. Ultimately, the failed marriage resulted in the Giants paying Beckham $20 million for 12 games in the 2018 season. Even if the trade is viewed as a positive for the Giants now, the financial impact of the extension was significant.
Gettleman has acknowledged multiple times that his plan to win while rebuilding was flawed.
“As I’ve already admitted, ‘18 was not a stellar year, personnel-wise,” Gettleman said last week. “We’ve learned from our mistakes.”
If only it were that easy. There are consequences for such mistakes. The Giants just went 6-10 this season and have numerous holes to fill, yet they’re only projected to have the 19th-most cap space this offseason despite the benefit of having a quarterback on his rookie contract. Decisions like keeping Manning through the end of his contract and giving Solder a megadeal have financial implications that can’t be swept under the rug.
Mara and Gettleman both view the 2019 offseason as a step in the right direction. That’s debatable. The Giants certainly feel good about the Beckham trade despite the offense’s glaring lack of a No. 1 receiver. The lone big-ticket free-agent addition of the 2019 offseason — four years, $37.5 million for 30-year-old wide receiver Golden Tate — went about as poorly as the Solder signing. The evaluation of the 2019 offseason hinges on quarterback Daniel Jones, and the jury is still out on the sixth pick in last year’s draft.
“Our processes are better,” Gettleman said. “I think this past year showed the fruits of that, both in free agency and in the draft. I really believe strongly we’ll continue in that way.”
No one can dispute that Gettleman nailed free agency last offseason, while it’s too early to judge the draft. The Giants need a similar offseason this year as they continue to dig out of the hole created by the miscalculations of 2018.
submitted by cornbread36 to G101SafeHaven [link] [comments]

Dear Danielle: An Open Letter to the NFC North's Best Player

Danielle, I don't know if you're on the Vikings Reddit, but just in case, here is a letter imploring you to stay in MN.
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Dear Danielle,
Greetings from the winter wasteland that is Canada.
I send you this open letter with the collective angst of a weary fanbase on my shoulders. You see, us Vikings fans have been through a lot. Depending on when one started following this heartbreaking, yet oddly lovable franchise, the Vikings fan has witnessed up to four Super Bowl losses, several NFC Championship no-shows and narrow defeats, as well as a true smorgasbord of indignities too lengthy to count (the first ever Hail Mary, the Love Boat, Metrodome Collapse, the Walsh miss, Kamara’s record-setting Christmas, etc.). Indeed, Vikings fandom often feels like a buffet of disappointment; many of us are sitting at our tables feeling like we’ve filled (and emptied) our plate far too many times.
Every so often, though, Vikings fandom gets the sweet relief that comes from hope. In an experience not altogether unlike the relief of Pepto-Bismol after a night of culinary indulgence, we see a truly marvelous player lift our Vikings out of the doldrums of mediocrity. You are that player, Danielle.
When you first arrived in Minnesota, there were reports about Mike Zimmer threatening you with violence. It struck us fans as odd that a relatively elderly coach – one who, as far as I can tell, does not have the history with jiu jitsu or karate necessary to defend himself against such a formidable foe – would threaten such a physically imposing player. Oddness aside, many us interpreted that over-the-top guidance from Zim as a sign of just how much potential you had.
In a few short seasons, the potential was unlocked, and you were wreaking havoc on opposing offensive tackles. Like a Packers executive tossing aside chances to maximize a quarterback’s potential, you tossed around men who have committed themselves to becoming immovable objects. In what felt like the blink of an eye, you ascended into one of the game’s truly elite edge rushers. Some still say that that wiener Aaron Rodgers is the division’s best player, but we all know you’re the real King of the North.
You’re underpaid. No one can look at the situation and come to any other conclusion. The issue, of course, is ol’Rick has very nearly spent every nickel and dime that those wealthy Wilfs have provided. What can we say, Danielle? Those guys in the front office pushed all their chips to the middle of the table; the issue, of course, is that Covid has changed the landscape of NFL poker. If it will help, I’ll do my best to contact Rick about locking in more guaranteed money. If we are to have any hope of snagging that Lombardi, we need you in a purple uniform.
True, we have yet to get to the peak of Mount Champion. Perhaps this reality should deter us, pushing us toward the Twins or maybe even the Wild (T-Wolves just isn’t going to happen). For some reason, we remain loyal to our team. Despite our big-game failures, we’ve had several sources of pride, parts of the game that we can hang our collective Viking helmet on. One of our great sources of pride rested in the formidable defensive line, of which you were yet another addition to an exemplary tradition.
I’m sure I don’t need to lecture you about the myriad of great Vikings d-linemen who have preceded you. Instead, I reference this proud tradition to illustrate the unique opportunity that currently presents itself. Many d-linemen have done excellently, but you have the capacity to surpass them all.
I send this letter posthaste in the hopes that it may nudge you down the purple path. Should you lead us to a Super Bowl, I’ll very gladly spend my money to fly to Minnesota so I can start mixing the cement for your statue outside of U.S. Bank Stadium.
If you feel you need more convincing, please don’t be shy about reaching out. May your arms grow ever more chiseled. Yours Truly,
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https://vikingsgazette.com/minnesota-vikings-danielle-hunter-lette
submitted by CoachFlanders to minnesotavikings [link] [comments]

After 2 years, I've finally launched Deadly Desserts! You guys have been an awesome help and I'd love to give back to this community. I tested with over 150 people before launching. Here is a post detailing my process prototyping, testing, and iterating the game.

After 2 years, I've finally launched Deadly Desserts! You guys have been an awesome help and I'd love to give back to this community. I tested with over 150 people before launching. Here is a post detailing my process prototyping, testing, and iterating the game.
Deadly Desserts game
Hey everyone, several days ago I posted asking whether people would find value in my detailed process developing and testing Deadly Desserts and it seems like there’s some appetite. I’ve found this community incredibly valuable and would like to give back by hopefully helping some of you.
I’ll be focusing on game design as that’s this subreddit’s focus. Just one point on publishing as it relates to design: if you plan on launching on the website that rhymes with TrickFarter (trying to get past auto-mod), your game design should ideally be expandable so that you can offer meaningful campaign exclusives.
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Background
Around 2 years ago, some friends introduced me to Hearts, a classic card game. It seemed pretty basic during my first playthroughs. After playing more and adding my own rules, I loved how strategic this simple game was. Surprisingly, Hearts had been around 100+ years, yet very few people I knew had played it. I wanted to play Hearts with more people, but they kept losing interest. The problems I ran into were people being turned off by playing cards and the new player experience being unwelcoming. I wanted to fix these problems so that I could play this game more. Here are some of the biggest problems and how I solved them:
  • Turned off by playing cards - solved with food-themed cards and game
  • Memorizing card point values - solved by printing points on cards and having table on player aides
  • Adding points on paper and not knowing how many someone else has - solved with food-themed health tokens
  • Limited to 3-4 players - solved:
    • 2 players - created new mechanic of playing 2 cards each, 1 at a time
    • 5 players - used 60-card decks to normalize hand size and game pacing
    • 6-10 players - added a 2nd deck and cancellation rules
  • Additional cards to double effects, scoring changes, and other changes related more to strategy and game pacing
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Feedback loop
When I first started, I approached game development as a linear process. I realize now that it’s a continuous loop. The three steps I continuously cycled through are:
  • Testing - playing with people and measuring success of changes
  • Synthesizing - analyzing testing feedback and deciding changes for next iteration
  • Iterating - implementing changes based on feedback
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Testing
I tested with 150+ people before launching Deadly Desserts. Although the entire game development process is a continuous loop, I took a fairly linear approach as to who I tested with. I’d loosely recommend you use the following playtester order. I didn’t strictly follow this recipe because sometimes the opportunity presented itself to test with certain people.
Myself
I’d say 50% of implemented feedback came from self-testing. I genuinely had a blast with it, too. Here are the main reasons I recommend starting with self-testing:
  • Fastest feedback cycle and iterations
  • Catch low-hanging fruit changes before using valuable testing time
  • The game needs to be fun for me before it’s fun for anyone else
As an example, I tested a 5-player game myself. I used a typical 52-card deck, removed 2 cards, and dealt 10 cards to each player. I felt annoyed when a player started with no cards of a certain suit (e.g. no hearts in starting hand). I also didn’t like the pacing, as I was used to 13-card hands. I did math and found that 12 card hands (60-card deck) decreased the probability of no cards of a certain suit from 16% to 8%. This was a problem I didn’t have to spend valuable playtests to figure it out.
Another example, I wanted to figure out how to play with 6+ people and found this bgg thread. It adds a 2nd deck and a new rule in which copies cancel one another out. I tested it and was simmering with how fun the cancellation mechanic was. It created a new strategy where I could lead a hand with an undesirable card, hoping the other person with said card would play theirs and cancel both of ours out. I tested out different hand sizes myself, so I could focus playtests on more impactful gameplay attributes.
The best part of self-testing is you’ll always be available during a pandemic!
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Board game developers
I started testing at board game dev meetups after fixing what I could through self-testing. I recommend testing with board game devs 2nd because:
  • Board game devs exposed to many mechanics and will have great feedback
  • Useful and fun learning opportunity from people who have launched board games
  • Learn how to give and receive valuable feedback before testing with others
My first tests didn’t yield much feedback and I couldn’t figure out why. When testing another dev’s game, I noticed he received much more feedback than I do. Whenever I or the testers (other game devs) gave feedback, the game dev simply wrote it down. I wondered why he didn’t respond to any of our comments and finally realized that feedback isn’t meant to yield rebuttals. During my own playtests, I kept on responding to feedback, trying to explain things. Other people saw this and likely were dissuaded from contributing. I learned that feedback is feedback - don’t refute or comment on it, just write it down and ask for clarification if necessary.
I remember during a particular playtest, me and other testers glazed a game dev with a wide variety of feedback. He felt overwhelmed and wasn’t sure how to proceed. A tester asked what he changed from the previous iteration. The game dev said that in his previous iteration, all players met their win conditions at similar time-frames, despite all of the decisions made to get there. Essentially, he didn’t want the game to be as luck-based. Providing valuable feedback was much easier when focusing on a particular goal. Here’s what I learned:
  • The best way to learn how to receive valuable feedback is to learn how to give valuable feedback
  • Define goals for playtests, primarily how well the new iteration’s changes produce the intended outcome
  • Testers won’t know what I’m testing for unless I tell them
I tried to test others’ games before asking them to test mine. I also noticed that people tried much harder to provide valuable feedback to me after I had to them. It’s in your best interest, and is more life-fulfilling, to help others before asking for help.
The meetup I used to go to is currently frozen, but hopefully there are virtual meetups out there. You can also try a gaming simulator. This subreddit is also a great place to find other board game devs!
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Friends and family
Here’s why I recommend testing with friends and family 3rd:
  • Start testing game’s entertainment value with a broader audience (game devs are more hardcore)
  • Loved ones are much more collaborative than strangers
  • Fine tune game before testing with strangers
I conducted my first blind test with family, where I asked them to read the instructions themselves and play while I quietly observed. I noticed their feedback was more focused on making the game fun, whereas game devs' focused on competitiveness.
Once when visiting my parents, my mom wanted to play Deadly Desserts and I told her that I hadn’t figured out 2-player rules. Since she’s the best mom ever, she spent several hours with me experimenting with different ideas, until we came up with the 2-player variant that’s in the current game. Thanks mom!
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Strangers
This was the most important test group because these are the people I would eventually want to buy my game. They didn’t know me and didn’t have sympathy from being a fellow game dev. They had no reason to care about my feelings and consequently gave critically honest feedback.
One of my biggest challenges throughout this project was finding playtesters. I didn’t want to pay and didn’t have a big following. Here were my main sources for testing with strangers:
  • Sat outside high-traffic areas (e.g. Peet’s Coffee) and offered free cupcakes or cookies to playtest
  • Board game cafes
  • Other board game devs’ game nights
Other game devs said they tested with dozens a day at board game conventions. I didn’t try it because I thought Deadly Desserts would be too light for a convention, but in hindsight it’s worth a try before writing off. Either way, your game is hopefully light enough to do what I did outside of coffee shops, or heavy enough to test at board game conventions. Both of which are sadly not too feasible during a pandemic.
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Synthesizing
My general approach to synthesizing feedback was:
  1. Filter feedback for which problems need to be solved
  2. Solve problems
  3. Self-test before iterating game
I found it imperative define my game’s value proposition. One of my biggest challenges was figuring out how to sift through feedback. I pushed the game in many different directions by addressing every comment. Without a value proposition, I had no structure to decide which changes to implement and how to measure success of said changes.
Board games differ from other businesses in that they provide entertainment, rather than solve problems. Consequently, it’s not as obvious as to how to measure progress for a board game.
  • Let’s say we’re trying to solve the problem of water bottles not keeping water cold
  • Our value proposition, the reason why people would buy our bottle, is fluid staying cold
  • This can easily be measured by comparing water temperature in our bottle vs Bottle X after a certain time period
  • Let’s say a customer thinks the bottle isn’t stylish and we find a stylish material that reduces insulation by 25%
  • Since we have a clearly defined value proposition, it’s obvious that this feedback would diminish it’s intended value
One of the most common pieces of feedback I received was people wanting more complexity. I spent a lot of time going back and forth between complicating and simplifying the game. After enough noodling around, I remembered that I originally sought out to be able to play my version of Hearts with more people. After defining my value proposition, I stopped bouncing around and was able to push the game in a certain direction.
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Iterating
Team
In the past, I had launched a product that I had paid a contractor to develop. I had many issues with deadlines and quality because the contractor wasn’t tied to the product how I was. It also wasn’t as fun because the relationship felt too professional. For Deadly Desserts, I wanted teammates instead of contractors. I recruited a designer and animator as equity partners. Working with teammates is boat loads more fun than working with a contractor.
Implementing
I spent a ton of time theorizing how much fun certain changes may or may not be. I made progress faster by iterating and testing quickly, rather than spending too much time planning.
Prototyping
I tried not to spend capital unless I needed to, both financially and temporally. My first prototype was index cards and poker chips. Once the card designs were more finalized, I used Print & Play to create more legit-looking prototypes. Get creative and spend only on what you need. In my case, card design was a huge value proposition, so I wanted to test it. Over time, I also improved at not asking my teammates to create something until I had it finalized in my head and self-tested.
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End
Thanks for reading and hope this helps someone. At the end of the day, don’t forget that you’re creating something that brings fun to peoples’ lives. Have fun yourself and enjoy the process. Here’s Deadly Desserts if you’re interested in checking it out. Feel free to ask me anything. I’m also happy to test a few games for people.
tl;dr: define a value proposition, test, synthesize, iterate, nice
submitted by DeadlyDesserts to tabletopgamedesign [link] [comments]

JoJo's Bizarre OC Tournament #4 - Round 3 Match 4 - Cabernet Sauvignon and Inch Nine vs Byte and Fira B

The results are in for Match 2.
Jade had been building, and building, managing to shrug past the bullets sent their way and just eating the chips in their quite literal armor, able to easily replenish it with yet more mud. The mud had stopped Dread from chasing them, and she had gone off and burned the place to scare the people off. Whatever. It complemented what it was they had desired…
All it would take now was this finishing touch, this last gesture of nonaggression towards Sentient Oona, who they were certain simply wished not to be bothered, did not care for any of this commodification of its very existence.
It was crass. It was sickening. It drove Jade, who just wished to live their own life, mad to think about, and now, nobody would follow, soon as they were a short swim through the basin away. The shrine itself would be a sinking island of concrete silk soon. All that would be left then was to use the cover of the dirtying water to avoid the bullets of the fan club, the last guard unit perched within the shrine.
Yet bullets never came, and above them, Jade felt instead a terrible heat, noted the appearance of spiked rubber on their mud-caked back. Something with an exoskeleton like an insect’s stood above them, they careened their head to see who was above them. It was Dread, barely swerving her body past dragonflies which had caught on to her malicious intent and meant to fry her.
“You again… I said fall down… Off.” They spoke with guttural contempt. “How did… You even…”
“You ruined my new boots, Antlerhead, but I am afraid that as much as the ground by which we did our battle had been soiled… You miscalculated in, I think, a fateful way, to utilize that ghastly terminology.” Briefly, indicatively, she looked to her side, and Jade understood as their opponent continued. “You didn’t destroy the bridge first. All I needed to do was walk across, watch your movements… And hop on.”
“You... still talk… too much.” Jade grunted, then, and spat at her, putting on their strongest face.
Then they saw so many dragonflies, flying towards both of them as fell bladed arms raised and descended.
The winner is Dread, with a score of 73 to Jade’s 71!
Category Winner Point Totals Comments
Popularity Tie 15-15 The first two matches in a row, up to the final moments, saw decent turnout while resulting in a tie by deadline.
Quality Red Carpet Renaissance 24-21 Reasoning
JoJolity Black Hill Estate 24-25 Reasoning
Conduct Tie 10-10
After a few futile moments trying to commune with the alien, Dread stepped over that bridge once more, back onto land and stood over the lake where they had left Jade. After that final confrontation, the dragonflies had all dissipated, Sentient Oona either sated or exhausted after that final exchange of blows, and for a few days, slumbering.
Both of the fighters had been covered in blood, covered in gore, covered in wounds. The fire raged on even as the trapped god’s rage quelled, heat counteracted by the cool of the muddy, bloody lake, which Dread, feeling theatrical, turned herself away from.
“How quaint! A beast such as yourself thinking you had a chance beating a woman of my stature. Cute, really. Your malodorous challenge was something indeed, and I will admit that you… That you…”
Dread’s lip began to quiver. Her trip was RUINED!
She didn’t even get a single souvenir! Her train of thought lost, tears well in her eyes. Joywave fell, and she turned away from Jade, beginning to sob. She needed to go hug someone.
To this end, then, she ran and ran, tromping across the edge of the marsh towards the direction of the evacuating town she’d last seen her friend head, who surely would be not judgmental over such a platonic request as consolation. Mr. Jones was surely-
Ah. He’d already left, huh?
All he had left behind, then, was the Green Flying Man, clutching a massive gash in his flickering, transformed torso, hand feebly fumbling with a rotary phone in one of the few buildings not on fire yet.
“H… H-hello? Matilda? It’s… Nngh, it’s an emergency situation! The… The Estate is empty, and the closest member’s here with me in Sentient Oona and I’ll try and get back with them, but a guy cut his own leg off and died and everything’s on fire and Memory… He grabbed Memory Management, and said he knew how to kill her, that he would if she doesn’t-”
Click!
A fell claw hung the phone up, then severed the line, and Green collapsed, having been tripped and sent to the floor.
“Y-you! But if you’re here, th-that means-” Green whined. “No… No, no, no…”
“Do not irritate me with your whining!” The crying Dread, using Joywave, brought her hand down, then the other, then raised them, then brought each down again, and repeated this, and repeated this. “I! Am in! A very bad mood!”
The Green Flying Man was not long for the world anyway thanks to the distinctive sabre wound which had gouged him (a normal man would have been dead already), despite what he had said to assure whoever he was on the phone with, already fading from being, but he practically disintegrated seconds into Dread’s onslaught, and she hardly registered this until she stood, breathing heavily in the aftermath of her tantrum.
If… If what he said was true, then the reason Mr. Jones has left me here, messy and with no souvenirs to my name… Still sniffling pathetically, Dread quivered, trying to stiffen her posture. Then he, at least, had his success…
There’s only a few hours left, as of posting this match, to vote in its predecessor, a duel between a cactus-mancer and a clone-summoner in a clock tower.
Scenario:
Elephant Bones 2 - Afternoon
The empty former diner and tax shelter, adjacent to the legitimate restaurant to which it was a sequel, had constantly had people watching after it since the incident before, when ANVIL militia members had occupied it with the intention of using it to raid and capture the restaurant proper. For Fira B, the place made for a fine space to do paperwork and generally not be easily found when she wasn’t outright needed, also serving double duty in how it kept hooligans from their hooliganry.
“I raise you better dental. It’s a top-secret dental plan - people like us normally don’t get to know about it. But... you gotta risk 8% of the raise you earned so far.”
Byte, sitting at the table opposite her, pondered it over, not typically the type to end up in poker games, but having wanted a raise and found himself very easily swayed by Fira, basically, implying he was afraid to handle it this way, worried he would lose. Sure, Fira was probably blatantly cheating, but hey, so was he, and as it was, his pay was about to go up 10%.
Thanks to his Stand, he already had everything he needed to make a perfect game… All saved in spades, card-counted to hell for the perfect moment, and this forbidden dental plan for teeth beyond compare had been his ultimate goal this entire time.
“Alright, I’ll call.” The final hands were dealt and played to, then, tensely, before he declared, putting it all down on the table, “royal flush, all spades! Those secret teeth are as good as-”
Fira, grinning, displayed her own hand, then, having prepared her own forbidden technique for this exact eventuality, this moment. Not one, two, three, or four Aces in her hand, nor even something so hackneyed as an errant fifth Ace. She had gone beyond Poker, and displayed a devastating, never-before-seen six Aces technique, all in different suits. Everyone in real Poker knew that that was even better.
“No way… Dammit, that’s cheating! No way you seriously got-”
“So were you. Don’t forget this loss, Byte. Work hard, and maybe one day you’ll be able to get any teeth you want. Even mine, if you’re ruthless enough.”
He was about to raise an objection, then, when another figure walked through the faux-restaurant doors, carrying with them a face-obscuring massive gift basket full of assorted soaps and candies that look like soaps. More troublingly, as both parties present immediately narrowed their eyes at, though, was the uniform the figure was wearing.
They were clad in body armor, aqua and blue with white accents, the unmistakable colors of VALKYRIE and its members, complete with the sidearm all were known for carrying idly resting at their side.
“What do you want.” Fira asked sternly, about to stand up.
“Oh, the boss asked me to drop these off to sweeten the deal!”
“Deal?” Her voice lowered, and she stood tall, Byte almost wanting to grin at the sight of what was to come. “I don’t know anything about a ‘deal’.”
“Oh, right, uh, probably should’ve led with that!” Awkwardly, the recruit, young-looking, Byte surmised, put the gift basket down on the table. “See, uh, he wants you to swing by the address on the card later, says he’s sure you could help with-”
Effie Linder was sitting outside, fiddling frustratedly with the wi-fi as she tried to remember exactly what the new password was, only to see the man who’d walked in in a VALKYRIE uniform literally thrown out, crying out and hitting the pavement like a ragdoll. It made her smirk, despite herself and her contempt for the boss.
Fira brushed her hands off, seething and staring before letting the doors shut. Byte, meanwhile, looked over the gift basket, smelling one of the soaps, and one of the candies, within.
“Not bad, actually… Whoever picked this out has some taste. Always bugged me how soap doesn’t taste like it smells…”
“Eugh, I swear… VALKYRIE is acting chummy with us now... It’s one thing for their enemies to fight us because of some bad timing, but we are not people VALKYRIE sends gift baskets to!”
“Never even heard of Ugo McBaise sending gift baskets to anyone…” Byte quipped, curious.
“Exactly. It’s a passive-aggressive thing, clearly. They’re trying to tell us to play nice.” Fira cracked her knuckles, turning to him then. “You can admire soaps later. What’s the address on that card? Let’s go there and beat the hell out of Ugo. Send a message that we’re not friends, and his bones should be broken right now.”
“Hey, alright, I’m down,” Byte said, finding some amusement in the situation as he stood, slowly, opening up the card. “Besides… I know, different branches and all, but you know what happened to Zebra… All because he was backing Peres up in her fight against this company. Like, dammit, I was on that trip, too… Like half of us were, and people risked their lives and died trying to get that Ocean Soul caught alive in the first place, and then some guys from this company show up and then it’s all for nothing. Maybe I’ll feel better calling this a sort of revenge.”
The Black Hill Estate - Afternoon
Inch Nine paced around her room rubbing her temples. Ever since the fight she’d had with Byron Oxbow, everything in her life had gotten more complicated. She’d brought it up with Klein once, and the conflicted expression in his face had stuck with her. Pretty much any friends she had made with connections to the Industrial District reacted that way, to various extents. Inch was a cool headed person, but even though she struggled to show it, it affected her.
Thoughts rushed through her head on who was at fault for this… Cairo, Fira, Byron, that commander of his. Even with all of that a thought kept flowing through her head. Maybe herself, even. If she had only been able to talk Byron down, been more forthright about where she stood, it might have been avoided. She could have worked something out and her relationships would all be fine and so much hurt could have been avoided.
No. No, that was stupid, too.
It was that bastard, Ugo McBaise, and that horrible company he ran. He couldn’t help but keep pushing and pushing forward, turning a security company into a household bogeyman. Of course everyone would have been less on edge, never would have been at war in the first place, had it not been for that lot.
Yes, saying that, Inch felt at peace again, if only for a moment.
As that thought finished a small knock came at the door. Soon enough, she heard a voice she recognized well - that of her teammate, Cabernet Sauvignon, who came through the other side of the door. “Hey, we just got a letter and a gift basket from these VALKYRIE guys… Actually quite a nice fellow at the door, said it was specifically for us.”
“Hm.” Inch tilted her head. It had an… Assorted smell to it, and everything did look quite delicious. To test the mettle of this goodwill, she thought to grab something, take a bite…
She was glad that nobody could see the lower half of her face, the expression on it, at the random item within that she had taken, the soapy taste overwhelming her senses now. With a continued coolheadedness as Cab sat there surely unawares, she asked, “did he say what occasion this was for? I am to understand that this is not a company known for actions such as this, even if many of us have helped ODIN.”
“Said he had somewhere to be, then ran off before I could possibly entertain him,” Cab answered, “though I suspect perhaps that he was intimidated by my attempts to strike up a conversation about the exotic cheeses and scented candles which would best pair with the provided basket…” His face darkened a moment, then, as he added in a suspicious, perhaps self-importantly quiet tone, “and aside from that, probably whatever this is is suspicious as hell.”
“We are in agreement, then. No matter how polite they act towards us,” Inch said, her eyes narrowing at the deceptively tasty looking contents of the basket, towards the letter within, apparently from the head of the company urging them to come, “we can not abide by working with a man like that, or even being seen as his allies.”
“You know, I don’t know much about this Mcbaise guy, except by the reputation you all gave him, and this may be an old hobby of mine talking, but…” Cab gestured for the card, then, to glance, for himself, over the address. “If they’re going to roll out the red carpet for us, what do you say we head over there just to knock some heads?”
“I could not have thought of a better message myself. Perhaps you are not all culinary knowledge and trivia, Cabernet.”
Business District, Noon
As one would naturally do when receiving a “suspicious as hell” gift basket, Inch and Cab soon decided to investigate further, going to the address mentioned in the card the next day, driving Cab’s truck over there.
That was a mistake; the two of them must have spent almost an hour trying to find any available parking spot afterwards. The odds were stacked against them, but they eventually managed to find an overpriced spot fifteen minutes from their destination that they could stay in for a while, and went on their way.
Inch and Cab made their way through the hustle and bustle of the district, but after a couple minutes of walking, Inch spotted something out of the corner of her eye that gave her pause - a teal-haired woman walking angrily through the street, whom she’d fought for her life alongside not long ago. Fira.
Inch casually walked over, Cab following along behind her, and made her way to Fira, waving. “Hello there, Fira!” She said, actually sort of pleased to see her.
She didn’t expect to see a friendly-ish face here, so it was a welcome sight. Per usual Fira’s expression right now wasn’t one many people would call “friendly,” which is to say that she seemed even more pissed off than she usually did.
“Oh, Inch. You’re here. Hello.” Verbose as ever, Fira B.
“I am. What brings you here, Fira? You live and work quite far west of here, non?”
Before Fira said anything, Byte stepped in, taking over from there. “Those VALKYRIE assholes sent us some kind of gift package filled with soap and candy... wanted to win us over, I guess, make us do something for them, so we’re heading over to tell them to fuck off and beat that Ugo asshole up.”
“Oh! We received a similar package too... I had just thought of what candles I might buy while out here to combine with it all, offer the perfect ambiance for some aged Caciocavallo Podolico, but we agree - something’s suspicious about this…” Cab said, Inch nodding along.
Inch spoke up again then. “If all of us are heading towards the same place… I suppose it is best for us to all go together, non?”
“Guess so.” Fira, though not exactly overjoyed at the idea, seemed receptive enough to it, and neither Byte nor Cab objected either, so the four stand users went on their way. Each, though imagining different melodies, were totally all picturing the scene as being paired with some kickass background music or another.
Making their way towards the address, they noticed that there seemed to be less and less of the tall skyscrapers common to the district surrounding them, and more and more buildings directly associated with VALKYRIE - that made sense, given that this was their part of the district.
As they went along, Byte kept looking around, even more so than the rest of them, always looking and commenting on whatever came to mind for him - “hey, that building seems like a pain in the ass to work in,” “oh, that dude actually looks kind of strong, I bet he could take those other guys over there. Not me though, obviously,” and other inane comments. Soon enough, everyone else simply started tuning it out, paying them no real heed and going on along their way.
Eventually, they reached the address - a building, larger than most others in the area, marking the entrance to a VALKYRIE training ground. Getting near the building, Byte noticed something - a man in a VALKYRIE outfit, walking towards them. He seemed quite well built, enough so that Byte figured he might even have to use BRB to beat him were things to come to that. “Hey, that VALKYRIE guy over there seems like he wants something with us, no?”
No response. The man got closer.
Byte wondered to himself how he could get the attention of Fira or the other two without pissing them off. Eventually, he decided to give Cab a light slap on the shoulder to grab his attention - he didn’t seem particularly threatening, especially when compared to Fira or Inch.
Cab, who seemed to be lost in thought looking at the building, turned to Byte with a sour expression. “What do you want, and why would it necessitate hitting me?!”. He seemed angry, but Byte simply shrugged in response. “Well, you weren’t responding to what I said, and-”
“Uh… excuse me? You’re the ones we called over, right? Inch Nine, Cabernet Sauvignon, Fira B, and-”
“What do you want from us.” Before the man, who seemed to be surprisingly docile considering his build and appearance, could finish, Fira interrupted him, and he found himself angrily stared down by all four of the stand users. The man stammered for a bit, unsure of how to respond or what to say...
“Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey… let’s all calm down, yeah?” The intense staredown was interrupted when a voice came from afar, one that was familiar to Fira.
“Hey, wait a sec…” She cocked an eyebrow in disbelief, grunting and adding as she turned, “no way… Is it seriously-”
A man clad in a dark suit colored like VALKYRIE’s armor, adorned with cute shapes had emerged now, clad professionally head-to-toe, dress shoes to black sunglasses, and lord, that hair.
Such long hair, vertical and striped.
Rushen Smith stood before the lot of them, strutting around like he’d owned the place or something. She’d beaten him once, but hadn’t been expecting to cross paths with him again.
“What do you want.”
“No need to be so hostile, yeah? We’re not calling you here to start trouble or nothing, so-”
“We’re?” Fira interrupted him. “You’re with VALKYRIE?” Well, if he was with VALKYRIE, at least Fira knew very well that she could still beat the shit out of him, given that she already had a good track record against him. Then, she’d move on to Ugo.
“So you’re like a… Miniboss, now.” Byte interjected, disappointed, yet ready to fight nonetheless.
“If I may finish.” Rushen sounded impatient
“To make a long story short… Ugo’s out. CEO fired him for everything he’s done. You’re not talkin’ to some crony to an NFL reject. You’re looking at the new head of VALKYRIE. For security and PR reasons, Allday has been been keepin’ quiet about it for now, preparing for just the right moment to tell the public, make sure I get revealed to the public with a good positive splash, but it is what it is. So… ready to talk now? Because I’m thinkin’ we can use your help, and we can definitely make it worth your while.”
Deeper within the premises - An Open-air training facility
Everyone had been disarmed by their confusion, and by Rushen’s goodwill, and by the thought that, just like that, one of the most threatening people in the city could just be fired like it was nothing, which made for Rushen a convenient situation. They were in line, following his lead, and as he did so, he brought them to a state-of-the-art training facility, one wherein dozens upon dozens of security officers in armor were walking around, shooting the shit, running, chatting by vending machines stocked with overpriced health food and sports drinks, and almost always giving Rushen a respectful nod and salute as he passed by, always meeting it with a cool, “at ease.”
“I still do not understand why we are here…” Inch, after some time being led around, spoke up. “I assume you sent those gift baskets to us, but even then, beyond wishing us here quickly, you did not say what you expect of us. Or even sign your name, beyond ‘the boss of VALKYRIE.’”
“Yes, like I said, my step into the private sector ain’t public knowledge yet… Trying to keep a lot under lock, ‘cuz I’ve inherited a backlog of things to take care of. Need-to-know basis… You know how it is.”
Fira nodded, saying bluntly, “so you’re planning something big. Want us to have a part. What? And why? Better not be wasting our time…”
“All Ugo ever taught people far as tactics went was a bullheaded, aggressive push forward… Rush, and rush, and rush, and just overwhelm opponents before they can think their way out.” Rushen explained. “It hasn’t been working, it got a lotta people on all sides or no sides hurt and killed who didn’t need to be, and while he used to have a man for handling stuff that took a brain, long story short… He’s no longer with us either. We’re trying to work on a way to save the people of this city from what’s up ahead, and no point in doing that if there’s no one to save, yeah? VALKYRIE needs to be better… We need to reorient, pick and choose better battles, get better at fighting them. No more bullcrap about raiding bars or stealing cows, yeah?”
“So you want us to… Help you retrain this security company?” Byte asked. “Why us?”
“The four of you felt right for it,” Rushen answered, looking each of them over in turn, “Byte, I know the part you played in that shipyard incident, and while I still ain’t pleased at what you were working for then, and it really messed Jesse up in a bad way, that’s all over now. The Ocean Soul business is done and in the past, and you’re real good at what you do.”
He was quiet, then.
“Fira,” he continued, “you’re another career criminal in this city, and you and I both know it, but we need someone who can think like that, someone with fight in her, for what I’m trying to get these guys ready for. Now ain’t the time to get picky… Long as you keep minding your business.”
“I try. Some people make it so hard.” Fira snorted, folding her arms.
“Inch, you used to be seen with Cairo a whole bunch, until right around when a certain incident happened… You know what I mean, don’t you?” She and Fira sneered, and Rushen raised a hand. “I’m not here to criticize, mind. I like your style, and that cool gator power thing you got going for you, hear you’ve got some real good learning techniques, and most important of all, I hear the two of you managed to survive bein’ in the dead center of Byron Oxbow at his angriest in thirty years.”
“You are… Praising me. It is appreciated, thank you.”
“And Cab,” Rushen continued, “you are the whitest man I have ever met, and I’ve got family in the same neck of New York as Douglas Jones. But hey, you’re a friend of Jesse’s, and these guys around here, they remember you at the battle on Capital Island, hurt and just popped outta this magic bottle, and still fighting with ‘em and helping people escape. You’re good people, and you got a particular edge to you I need too.”
“I saw I think a better side of VALKYRIE than most, by good circumstance,” Cab started, flattered by the mixed praise, ultimately happy to recognize it as stroking his ego, and a part of him warmed up for what was being praised turning out to be something besides the hobbies with which he’d filled the void. “Though I was just as willing to knock these guys’ heads in as everyone else here, you know… I certainly don’t mind this turnaround, though. And I think I’m starting to guess who it is you want to fight here, why you want a group like this in on it… Might you be planning to stake out the-”
“Not a word. Can’t let this get leaked.”
“Of course, of course,” Cab answered, quite confident in his mental answer nonetheless. “You mentioned this being worth our while… Can I ask what you mean by that?”
“The CEO’s gonna be watching this training sesh too, if you didn’t already guess… We’ll make sure all four of you are rewarded handsomely for this, of course, but if you really go above-and-beyond, she’s said she’ll throw even more bonus on top of all the dough. I recommend you shoot for that.”
“So we need to help train your guys better than these two, huh?” Fira answered, jerking her thumb at Inch and Cab.
“I mean, it probably is better for you to work with the person ya know primarily, but it’s not really a comp-”
“We are gonna blow whatever you guys are doing out of the water,” Byte interrupted, looking towards the Estate residents with a fiery look in his own eye. “We’ll show you the kind of training you can normally only see for a total premium at Dukes!”
“Yes, let’s one-up each other,” Cab agreed with an amused smirk, well aware that this competitive streak was unnecessary, but beginning to feel a certain fire in him, “what do you say, Inch? You up for the task of whipping these guys into crimebusting shape?”
“I suppose I am.” Inch herself was beginning to feel the air of competition, feel her blood pumping, “no hard feelings to either of you, if you are not selected for this… But we are simply going to do a phenomenal job.”
Rushen sighed, shaking his head. “Least you ain’t trying to kill each other… Alright! I’ll roll with it.” He clapped his hands, perking up quite a bit. “Both of y’all are in charge of sixteen recruits who need retraining fast, and we’re gonna compare what you did at the end. Just don’t kill ‘em or nothing, or do nothing stupid, and for four hours, soon as you got a plan together, what you say goes. Got it? Good.”
Man, now I’m feelin’ the competitive spirit a bit… Really is contagious, huh? Probably gonna make ‘em do a better job… Ah, hell, now I’m feelin’ a certain urge. I’m gonna say it. I’m gonna!
“Open the game.”
(credit to magistelles for the awesome art!)
Location: A VALKYRIE training facility in the middle of the business district.
The area consists of track fields, indoor gymnasiums, shooting ranges, training equipment storage, training towers and practical training buildings as well as other training sites. There is also general equipment storage and a small infirmary on site.
Essentially any sort of equipment or facilities you’d expect to find in a military style boot camp can be found here. Things like body armor and helmets, large tires, guns (both handguns and rifles), training dummies, etc. If you aren’t sure if something can be found here, just ask the judges.
There is also a large amount of spare wood used for building obstacle courses.
Goal: Train your group of recruits better than your opponents in a 4 hour training session!
Additional Information:
You can assume there is minimal downtime from getting area to area within the full facility.
Each team has a group of 16 VALKYRIE recruits to be trained. Each of them has 333 physicals and a 2 in gun handling and a 2 in hand to hand combat. While your session is a full 4 hours, you may still need to consider the stamina of the recruits and schedule breaks for them accordingly. They are in full uniform, with helmets, combat boots, and body armor as well as a pistol and baton each. They also have equipment that lets them see stands. They each have spare uniforms and can be refitted with training equipment from the equipment storage as needed. They also have assault rifles and walkie talkies in the equipment storage.
For the purposes of training they will generally agree to whatever you put them through short of anything that has significant risk of resulting in actual harm.
Teams are allowed to use/take anything from the facilities for the purposes of training.
In terms of Voting and Quality we are looking for a few different things:
  • Having effective training: This can mostly be boiled down to how well their training either strengthenings their bodies or helps them learn muscle memories or techniques that improve fighting.
  • Using your time effectively: Similar to having effective training, minimizing wasted time that could have been otherwise useful is also important.
  • Having your recruits last for as much of the training as possible: Having guys needing to be sent to the infirmary for injuries or overworking them before the 4 hours is up will affect your score negatively. While accidents can happen through say sparring or other mishaps, you should try to minimize any lasting damages to the recruits.
  • Having varied and well rounded training: Having them build skills in multiple areas, full body exercise over focusing on one or two muscle groups, and preparing them for a variety of scenarios.
  • Discipline: While your recruits will be following your orders for training, being able to command their attention and respect can go a long way on making an impression and bolster training effectiveness. On the flip side, doing things that make the recruits not take you or training seriously can defeat the purpose of training.
In terms of training, you can also consider anything security personnel should be trained in, not just strictly combat. That can include rescuing, defending people, perceptiveness, team coordination, etc.
Team Combatant JoJolity
The Graveyard Shift Fira B. “This pain-in-the-ass pillar is a reflection on that woman's personality...” You know, if you are going to be training these people, might as well make this fun for yourself. Personalize your training regiment as much as you can to make it unique with your abilities!
The Graveyard Shift Byte “Climb to the top of the pillar with just your hands. That's the only exit. If you can't climb out, you'll stay there until you die.” Anybody could just sit back and train people, that’s why you can’t bring yourself to do that. Be active and hands-on in your training!
Black Hill Estate Inch Nine “Climbing with something other than the ripple is not appreciated by the pillar... This "Hell Climb Pillar" only likes the ripple and knocks down everything else... Don't forget that.” No point in relaxing while they do all the training, might as well brush up on your own skills. Be active and hands-on in your training!
Black Hill Estate Cabernet “Cab” Sauvignon “It's the fault of the person who built that trap... whoever built this was really fucked up! Making me fall for that” While you could have them do just normal training, that is defeating both the point of the exercise and would be a complete waste of everybody’s time. Personalize your training regiment as much as you can to make it unique with your abilities!
Link to the Official Player Spreadsheet
Link to Match Schedule
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submitted by boredCommentator to StardustCrusaders [link] [comments]

CMV: Events such as Esports, chess, and poker should not be classified as sports, but are at the very most unconventional sports, which is to say competitions.

Disclaimer: Before I start, I am not demeaning the efforts of top competitors. Their sheer commitments to become masters are more than apparent through their inclusion of eating healthy, exercising, and countless hours of game study. It indeed is a respectable commitment. This will not be a subjective look at this topic like most of the debates are. As an ex-gamer, I do have a personal bias towards chess to tell the truth. When first drafting this argument, I actually tried to formulate why chess is a sport and video games weren't. Then I realised that they both weren't and shouldn't be considered as conventional. Do I still think most people say video games are sports to justify their gaming addiction? Yes. Do I think it's unfair for Esports to be compared as equal to Basketball? Absolutely. However, like I said, this is an objective comparison of the ever expanding world of competitive entertainment. And, as the rules say, I am open to discussion about changes
There are two popular definitions for "sport" that have been used for this topic. The first one from is from dictionary.com:
an athletic activity requiring skill or physical prowess and often of a competitive nature
Using this definition, we can automatically draw the line. Many pro-Esports people in this topic use chess as an comparison, saying if chess is a sport by this definition, then competitive video games can also be considered as one. However, while it does note that it can involve physical prowess or skill, neither activity is athletic by definition, which means physically strong, fit, and active. A Esports player may take up an exercise program to better their play, but it does not make them an athlete. It is not required for a person to be athletic to compete in Esports, chess or poker. The participants can not be called athletes, because the activity is not athletic. Therefore, by the definition found on dictionary.com, the argument that these activities can be considered sports is over.
So now, we can move to the more ambiguous definition found in Oxford dictionary, which identifies a sport:
an activity involving physical exertion and skill in which an individual or a team competes against another or others for entertainment
So here, there is room for argument. Exertion simply means effort, so by this definition an activity such as Esports can be considered sport or sport like. After all, the word comes from disport which means in the sense of recreation or entertainment. However, this does not mean that they should be considered as conventional sports at all, far from it. Conventional sports are athletic, and have these identical seven attributes to be considered as such.
These are what all athletic sports have in common, and can hold the present definition of a common or "regular" sport. Nonetheless, the Esports, chess and even bizarre activities such as dog boarding and outhouse racing meet many requirements on this list. I will refer to these as unconventional sports, even though chess and competitive video games are recognised for their sports like properties by the International Olympic Committee. They both get really close to qualifying as Olympic Sports, while those are different from sports played annually. According these overall requirements to be an athletic and annual sport, these fall closer to the definition of competition, which is the state or activity of competing. Additionally, this category can be split even further between physical competitions, or unconventional sports, and virtual competitions, or virtual sports.
Physical competitions, such as chess and poker, meet six out of seven of the requirements above. Chess is notorious for its requirement of mental prowess, not unlike athletic sports are for their brute physicality. Physical exertion is present by moving the pieces or chips, and take place in a tangible environment where players can touch and interact physically with what they are doing. The objective for a chess player is to trap the king with his or her pieces, called checkmate. There is a definite competitive aspect, and self sustaining competition is conspicuous. Fédération Internationale des Échecs (FIDE), or the World Chess Federation, has over 170,00 active members, with the United States Chess Federation holding about 93,000. Chess.com alone has over 20,000,000 registered users. Poker has a huge following and world championships occurring annually since 2004. The place it falls short is the lack of consistent or common injury of the players. The risks of athleticism are generally associated with conventional sports. The thing that ties these unconventional sports together is the presence of a physical and tangible environment during play.
Virtual competitions, namely Esports, but also online versions of trading card games and E-chess, meet five out of seven qualities that conventional sports have. They do indeed include a great deal of mental concentration, prowess and overall development. Video games, thanks to a release of dopamine, do have mentally relieving benefits that are best showcased when played in moderation. Physical exertion of pressing keys or buttons on a controller is present as well. Physical and mental integration shown in top level events are astounding, with muscle memories and reaction times that are impressive to say the least. Competitive gaming is most known for its explosive popularity and ever expanding competition. Even twelve year olds are able to compete in these events. This is mostly due to video games being, let's face it, extremely entertaining to watch and play. Nonetheless, it does not by any means have a consistent injuring possibility, except for maybe a few cases of carpal tunnel here and there. What makes it set apart from the other unconventional sport is that it's strictly virtual. Gamers can not physically interact with the game they are playing. Virtual reality and the use of controllers is still not tangible. They experience only a fabricated world. And, in a gamer's mind, are they pressing buttons on a controller or are they playing a game? The use of controllers act as a medium of communication to the virtual world they are interacting with. Physically, competitive gamers have no connection with video games.
Reiterating the beginning clarification, I do not demean unconventional sports, whether they are virtual competitions or physical. Many get offended at the generalising of their favourite competitive activity as a competition, which is why I used the word unconventional. Also note that the dedication to these unconventional sports can be as demanding as some physical sports are. Chess can be a lifetime commitment for many, and as I can confirm, many, many, many hours are committed to studying tatics and theory of the openings. In the same way, taking the relatively new fighting game Smash Brothers Ultimate as an example, many hours are devoted by top players into studying match-ups, labbing true combos with their main character, and studying frames data and the interaction between them in detail.
The last thing I will address is the overall stereotypical attitude towards these unconventional sports. Many regard chess as a game for hopeless nerds, competitive video games for unemployed delinquents, and poker for financially unstable people. I won't deny these stereotypes as wrong, but as they're incomplete. Yes there have been World Chess champions that died penniless, and yes some Esports players are hot for a season and just vanish and are back to regular jobs. However, they don't consider the different, more positive aspects of these events. How excited these communities get over tournaments and announcements. The connections that are shared, the relationships that are built. How there is a general hype in these communities, and most importantly, how people's life stories are changed for ever. It is really easy for society to avert their attention from these moments. But the one thing to remember that everyone possesses on the Earth, and is born with, is a choice. A choice to live life how they please. Yes there will be consequences for every action, but no one can judge another individual's choices. Yes, society loves pointing fingers, but in reality, we are just as flawed as the people we condemn. It's just not right to tell a kid that they'll never make it in the NBA, NFL or whatever. And it is especially wrong to force it upon a person who dreams of becoming a competitive gamer that they will waste their time. If someone eventually falls out of being a top player, but still perceives it as an enjoyable experience, then it generally can't be classified as a waste of time. Imagine if a white collar person who reprimanded their son or daughter for wanting to be a competitor in Esports, saying they'll never amount to anything doing that, encountered a successful entrepreneur the next day who told them, "Office jobs are for soul-less people who chase money, and they won't ever make a mark on the world." That might wake them up from their corporate slavery, but some people might inherently enjoy their work. It's a really malicious punch to the gut. It doesn't matter if you think, or even know, someone is making a wrong decision for their life. At the end of the day, you have no control over the descions , even in parenting. Parents can do their best to influence children, and even have dominion over what they do and should be doing at a young age. After they grow older, there comes a point of life where they can't be ordered around anymore. Treat others how you would want to be treated.
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what are the best poker chips video

10 Best COIN & Poker Chip TRICKS! (How to Tutorials) Best poker chips trick Ever - YouTube Rounders Poker Chips - The Great Poker Chip Adventure ... 2021 Top Ten Best Poker Chips Ever In The History Of The ... What is the Best Website to Buy Facebook Poker Chips ... 2020 Poker Chip Guide - YouTube TOP 5 BEST POKER TRAPS OF THE DECADE! - YouTube Best Poker Chip Sets: Complete List with Features ...

The Fat Cat Clay Poker Set is made for enthusiasts and the fat cats hosting a poker game with up to ten players. The set features 500 11.5-gram striped dice chips made from claytec and two decks of cards, this set is a perfect long-term investment. The best thing about Fat Cat’s poker chips is that they feature alternating stripes. Without the additives, clay would never be the best choice for poker chips — by itself. A pro-level clay chip, on the other hand, will last for years of home poker games. (The various components used to create a manufacturer’s “perfect” chip for the casinos is, unfortunately, also a formula that creates chips that need to be replaced The best ceramic poker chips for home games are: MRC 500pcs Laurel Crown Ceramic Poker Chips Set with Aluminum Case 500pcs Laurel Crown Ceramic Poker Chips Set Wood CASE Custom Build by MRC The best poker chip sets come with everything you need to get started, including dealer buttons and decks of cards. Some sets even come with plaques to represent excessively large amounts of winnings. Some important considerations when picking out poker chips are material and weight. The most popular materials for poker chips are plastic or composite for casual use, and ceramic or clay for casino or professional quality. Ceramic tend to be more expensive and have a slick texture, but they are highly durable. Currently, the best poker chip set is the Trademark Poker Dice Style. Wiki researchers have been writing reviews of the latest poker chip sets since 2015. Ezvid Wiki Best poker chips have been around probably as long as the game has been in existence. Though in the earlier days the game had been played with just about anything, soon there was a need for using a standard currency equivalent at the tables and with that the poker chips had been introduced. If you’re on the market for a new set, here are some of the best poker chip sets of 2019: Fat Cat, 11.5 grams, 500-count. This poker chip set from Fat Cat comes with everything you need to host a game at home. It includes 500 Claytec 11.5 gram poker chips. Of these 500 chips, 150 are white, 100 are blue, 150 are red, 50 are green, and 50 are black. On the average, you will need 100 chips at the minimum per player. Remember that the majority of your poker chips comprised of the two lowest denominations. Purchase at least 20 high denomination chips to make sure you don’t run out of them during a high-stakes poker game. Now you know more about poker chips and how you can choose the best ones. Best Sellers in Poker Chips #1. Fat Cat 11.5 Gram Texas Hold 'em Claytec Poker Chip Set with Aluminum Case, 500 Striped Dice Chips 4.7 out of 5 stars 4,280. $56.99 #2. Da Vinci 50 Clay Composite Dice Striped 11.5 Gram Poker Chips, Choose from 11 Colors 4.7 out of 5 stars 904.

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10 Best COIN & Poker Chip TRICKS! (How to Tutorials)

Best Poker Chip Sets: Complete List with Features & Details - 2019 Click here to buy: https://amzn.to/2kjxCgJ #bestpokerchipsets #chipsets #sports&fitness Cl... Looking for some new poker chips? This might be a good place to start. Each of these chips has their own review so be sure search my channel for more reviews... Tell us what you think of my list as of this week and give us your list in the comments below.Support this channel:https://www.patreon.com/HobbyJonYou can al... If it's cheap facebook poker chips you want, http://www.MomsChips.com is the place to go. Sure having some friends over on the weekend for a poker game and a... How to do Top 10 Best Coin and Chip Tricks!! Subscribe Now for more How To’s, Pranks, Tricks, Social Experiments and Fun Videos: http://bit.ly/ucmagic and My... TOP 5 BEST POKER TRAPS OF THE DECADE!Help us to 200K Subscribers - http://goo.gl/Bvsafo Turn on the '🔔' to get notifications for new uploads!If you are rea... You should FOLD against him.... Ever see a movie called Rounders? Here are some great poker chips that resemble those. NOTE - It is my opinion that these are the highest quality clay poker ...

what are the best poker chips

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